jesus radical

Someone who wants to make sweet love to jesus because he has muscular theighs that could crush a walnut!! Or someone who thinks Jesus is the goods.

Maranda: Wow olivia, I'm wearing my super hot Jesus Sandles!!!
Olivia: Well of course you are, you're a Jesus Radical.
Maranda: HELL YEAH

Pete: Wow, i want to make sweet love to that jesus radical over there.

Bob: Yeah...I'm a fuckin' jesus radical

3👍 8👎

Jesus hole

Due to the Christian restriction on extra-marital sex, the Jesus hole is a synonym for a vagina.

Guy: I'm gonna fuck your Jesus hole real good.
Girl: No way, we're not married, put it in my pooper instead.

3👍 7👎

Zombie Jesus

Someone whom believes himself to be a reincarnation of Jesus. He helps others while draining himself and is pretty much a martyr. He's also a pretty awesome person when you get to know him.

Dude! Help me out Zombie Jesus!

47👍 237👎

Quicksand Jesus

Thank you, psycho bitch

I got my name from the Skid Row tune above

16👍 69👎

Touched by Jesus

Great sex or forced rape, used by the rapist or by the victim at the police station the next day.

1.Wow! I feel like i was touched by jesus
2.Come here love and be touched by jesus (Rape)
3.He said to me would i like to be touched by jesus, sob sob.

10👍 40👎

Jesus-ical

approaching, but not quite equal to the awesomeness of Jesus.

Man, you guys don't even know. Harbor Branch was Jesus-ical.

2👍 5👎

Zesty Jesus

Sexiest man on earth with a mission to preach truth about everything, from ice cream flavors to video game cosmetics. Even despite being hated by many.

"Zesty Jesus's new video was fire! I've never seen such a based take on a video game weapon!"

2👍 5👎