Random
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Random
a camel toe.
Ashley:"Oh my gosh she has one serious baby jesus!"
Sammy: "Oh Baby Jesus!"
(hahahaha)
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A dark-skinned man of Jewish, Israeli descent, in (two) lifetimes revealed himself as god's son, performed many miracles, spurned the beginning of a religion based upon his teachings and those if his father, commonly called the "almighty" or God. Also, he was crucified for his crimes against the caesar of the time's laws and wishes, as well as undermining his authoritah. Real Jesus is commonly misconceived as Jesus Christ and HIS apostles, a whiter, more bearded and thorny-headwear inclined modern interpretation of a clearly Israeli-born man. Jesus Christ, however, was more widely accepted due in no small part to the common skin tone of his followers.
God:Wait, guys, uh....my son wasn't that white...
Vatican:WHATCHU SAAAAAY????
God:No seriously, he was Israeli.
Vatican:Nuh-uh. This guy with the thorn headband is Jesus.
God:Oh, lol, no that's Jesus Christ. I'm talking about my son, Real Jesus. Get it straight.
Vatican:*with fingers crossed* okaaay, we promise we'll change it....
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Code name for Anthony shoving his cock in a piece of chicken and using his piss as dipping sauce.
Wow that guys over there was pulling a Jesus and KFC.
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The purposeful inebriation durung 3 day music weekend, that it replicates the absence of the savior of Christianity.
Note- use of pre-meditated choice to inflict cognitive absence.
And, like main stream Christianity, there will be no proof that you really left at all.
“Bro, Featherweight Tyler went SO free-spiritedly high AF last weekend, he left reality Friday and came to Monday morn. He’s , like, Coachella Jesus” he resurrected himself.
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When annoying guys are bugging you and your boyfriend of why you didn't change your Facebook relationship status
"for jesus' sake! Just because we didn't change our Facebook status doesn't mean it's the end of the world..."
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Jews for Jesus. You can be a true Jew and love Jesus. Jesus was a Jew!
Jay is a big Jew for Jesus. He married Jesus because the big J is Jay’s bae.
When she prays, she prays to all the names of God and Jesus and more.
They held hands in bed and that’s all. Because Jews for Jesus.
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1: have you heard of Jesus Christ
2: yea hes based as shit
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