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Joe Garfield

Used in school culture to describe a person who cannot stop themselves from doing an extra 46 lengths of butterfly stroke in the pool. They also sit by themselves in language classrooms as they make jokes to themselves in German.

‘What are you doing after school? Ugh, don’t tell me you have swimming again.’

‘Yes of course I do, I am Joe Garfield!’

by pectore September 29, 2022


Garfield Monday

The surprise act of preforming oral sex on a hanging/asphyxiating man to completion while his voids his bowels.

John just wanted to end his suffering, but never expected his last day alive would be a Garfield Monday.

by Booby Tuesday December 3, 2022


National Garfield Day

June 19
Garfield

A: I feel like there is something special about today...

B: Its National Garfield Day

A: What a silly cat.

by luvtrashmouth January 15, 2024


2004 garfield movie

A funny movie featuring a funny obese orange cat who hates Monday’s who’s owner is Jon Arbuckle. Jon Arbuckle also makes some pretty good lasagna because Garfield eats that shit up. It is also the best movie of 2004.

“Yo, have you seen that one movie from 2004? I forget the name but it’s counted at the funniest in history.”
“Oh yeah! Of course I do. It’s the 2004 Garfield movie you dope.”

by Spencerschamber June 13, 2021


Buff Garfield

A buff version of the lovable orange cat Garfield, that is known to many, including me, as the strong creator of our universe. Also has a 10-inch shlong.

Joanna was minding her own business, walking through the halls of a large university. She was heading to her dorm, passing her fellow students. On her way to her dorm, a fellow friend of Joanna's was walking the opposite way to her, and decided to stop her for a quick little chat.
"Oh, Joanna, I'm glad I ran into you!" He said to Joanna, happy to see her.
"Oh, hey! What is it you need?"
"I just wanted to show you something that will make you... lose yourself..." He pulled out his phone and entered his pin. Confused and worried, Joanna waddles over to his phone to see what he wanted to show her.
He tapped onto the Photos app, and told Joanna to close her eyes. Confused, she nodded and proceeded to cover her eyes with her hands.
A minute later, Joanna was told to uncover her eyes, and her eyes widened at the sight on the phone. It was a picture of a buff version of the lovable character Garfield, wearing nothing but red speedos doing their very best to cover up the majestic ginger rod that Garfield was packing.
"May I interest you in... Buff Garfield?"
After hearing what he said and looking at the picture, a warm liquid could be felt trying to gust its way towards Joanna's womanhood. "I- I- gotta go!" Panicked, she ran to the nearest bathroom. She slammed the cubical door shut, and pulled down her skirt to stare at the liquid that came out of her. "Ahhh! H-how did I manage to cum just by looking at a picture of Buff Garfield? That has to be impossible!"

by short_story_examples June 1, 2023


andrew garfield’s quint owner

just like the good old busby fandom owners, kiara is andrew garfield’s certified quint owner. she rightfully claimed this spot and it can NOT be shared. anyone who tries to take andrew garfield’s current and only quint owner’s place has a fate of going 100000 years to prison. a part from getting a nice busby fandom canceling ofc.

person 1: did you see someone claimed to be andrew garfield’s quint owner?

person 2: no way!! that’s kiaras spot only

by andrewgarfieldspotbrownie February 18, 2022


Owen Garfield

A boy who loves his friends very much

Friend- Man Owen Garfield loves his friends

by Owen Garfield May 28, 2019