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A less extreme version of the exclamation, "shit on a shingle" used by the writers of Twisted Toyfare Theatre.
Person 1: I had sex with your mom.
Person 2: Well crap in a hat.
39đź‘Ť 6đź‘Ž
The only way to ride the coaster is to get covered in crap head to toe.
Oh wait, you're already on the crap coaster;
Shit.
One who falls asleep on the toilet
Why is it everytime I walk in the john, the crap napper is snoring in the handicap stall, yo?
When you go out to the mailbox hoping for some interesting mail, but only end up with ads from local stores
I walked outside today hoping to get a letter from Grandma, but when I opened up the mailbox, there was only crap mail from the furniture store.
Diarrhea from hell so firery and violent that you scream in pain.
Friend: “how was your date last night”
Me: “good? We hit up taco bell”
Friend: “uh oh”
Me: “yea I had the screaming craps in the middle of the night”
The shadow your butt casts as you slowly squat down to drop a deuce.
Getting out of something right before getting shit on. Literally or metaphorically.
The last taste of freedom before the ominous shadow is above you.
Tom: "Jeremy look out! There is a crap shadow overhead and you are about to get shat on"
Jeremy: "oh shit!!!"
Tom: "Glad I carry this toilet paper around."