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Someone with a very small dick, he is very ugly he looks like a donkey, he says he is straight but he is gay he downloads porn, and chases women when they are ugly as shit
He is such a Jon
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A Jon is no ordinary man (and we all know men are but flat-chested women who do not menstruate - although scholars still hotly debate if Jons do).
A guy is only a Jon if he satisfies ALL three of the following criteria.
1. Believes he be better than everyone else.
Eg: (Guy wearing a "I be so much better than you" t-shirt walks by)
Wizened old observer: "Kids these days are such Jons!"
2. Possesses a peculiar penchant for shattering glassware.
Eg: (A drinking establishment - that sells alcohols) *sound of shattering glass*
Weary bartender (who serves alcohols): *sigh* "Guess we have another Jon here today".
3. Has a thing for seagulls (optionally runs a seagull worship cult)
Person1: (Stares adoringly at a seagull that flies by overhead)
"Is there anything more musical than a seagull's cry?"
Person2: (looks worried)
"... I know your name is Jon, but I didn't think you'd be such a 'JON' Jon, y'know?"
Person1: My boss is such a Jon!
Person2: Oh no! I had one of those. Do NOT take any glassware there and best try to put up with his delusions of grandeur. I just hope you don't get pulled into any seagull cults.
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A Jon so stupid he would only be outshone by Wayne Rooney. Characterised by stupid actions and just general stupidity in life. Not a day passes where this Jon does not do something stupid. Very little awareness of his own stupidity until pointed out by acquaintances. Similar to Stupid John but spelt wrong.
"I've been sick everywhere"
...
"Stupid Jon".
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He is the coolest american you know. Very unique, very unique. Fun, friendly, talented, handsome, musical, kick-butt awesome! Everyone should know Jon Marc cause there is only one... tree hill.
Chick 1: Have you met Jon Marc?
Chick 2: Yeah, he is the coolest kid you'll ever meet!
Chick 1: Man, I wish I knew him. I've only ever heard of him.
Chick : Oh man! What a legend.
27👍 6👎
One of the biggest rappers out today. Has made the following words more famous than they were 5 minutes before he came along:
1. YEEEEEEAH!!!
2. OKKKKKAYY!!!
3. WHHHHHHAT???
Listen to the new song by Lil Jon. The lyrics are what?, yeah!, and okay!!!
444👍 175👎
the greatest person you'll ever meet.
Wow, that guy is incredible. What a Jon B.
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1. The best skier on the planet. Born in Sweden, he began as a ski racer and progressed into freestyle. As of late he has been going back to his roots and racing. This man is so awesome that he drives a lamborghini with a ski rack and lives in Monaco just because he can.
2. To pull a sweet trick in the park.
1. Jon Olsson is my favorite skier. Hands down.
2. Dude, that was so sick! You just Olssoned!
16👍 3👎