When you rub your sweaty balls on tissue paper and tie it around a friend's car's door handle.
My friends hacked my facebook so I gave them each an Australian bowtie.
6๐ 3๐
When a man ejaculates on a womans chest, she then goes outside and sunbaths until the jizz has cooked to the point where it resembles a flapjack. She then eats the resulting "flapjack".
Hey, did you hear? Brian gave his girlfriend an Australian Flapjack yesterday afternoon!
28๐ 25๐
Trying NOT to hit a kangaroo or wallaby whilst driving on a country road in Australia, but the blasted thing may still jump out in front of you. Trust me ... They cause a hell of a lot of damage to your car! This happens mainly at night.
Me: "Man! You can travel along a country road at night without playing a game of Australian Roulette with a roo!"
Tip: Honk your horn every so often to frighten them away from the road.
10๐ 7๐
The art of taking a poop into another persons anus. Then this person will poop it back into you, thus coming back to you like a boomerang.
Guy 1 " dude, I heard you did an Australian Boomerang last night?"
Guy 2:" Totally, except Greg had diarrhea"
Guy1 : " EWWWW"
23๐ 21๐
Finely trimmed pubic hair on a man or a woman.
Your mother's skirt was so short I could see her australian mustache.
14๐ 13๐
The sexual act of a male ejaculated on a woman's face then proceeding to blow dry it dry. The male then scrapes the dry cum off of her face and forces the cum into her vagina with his finger and then goes on to eat her out.
Guy 1: Dude I just had an Australian Zimberwak. It was horribly awesome!
Guy 2: Don't talk to me, that stuff is gross.
3๐ 1๐
When a sheila runs up to a roo with her hands up like she's about to box him so that he kicks her in the uterus. This is a 100% effective contraceptive
Plan B is too expensive, just pop over to the outback and get an Australian abortion.
3๐ 1๐