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chair boarding

The new sport that's sweeping the nation. It's a combination of skateboarding and office chairs. It rocks.

The rules dictate that a person must be sitting on an office chair that has the ability to adjust height and back rest. It must also be able to spin, that is a must.

To participate you must kick off the floor in a spinning motion (called an "ollie," by the veterans of the sport,) and then bust out some sick, ill moves without putting your feet back on the floor until you wish to "land."

Marks are scored out of ten in three different categories, giving a final score out of thirty. The categories are style (how the boarder incorporated the adjustment features in their spin), revolutions (how many times the chair spins during that one particular move) and pizazz (leg grabs, flip reverses, any sick move that your ill mind can think of).

Points are deducted for falling off the chair, bad pizzaz (bizazz if you will) and doing a crap landing (the pros call this, "bailing.")

The sport is still in it's infancy but I suggest you join up now so in five years when it's all the rage you can be like "man, I was chair boarding before you even knew what it was you big gay jaborni.

"Yo want a game of chair boardin?"

"Yeah dude, radical to the max!"

"Shut up."

"O.K."

"Actually, you can't play because you're a chump who falls of their chair, get some control man."

"Fair point, fair point."

by Ian Mckenna May 16, 2005

13๐Ÿ‘ 2๐Ÿ‘Ž


chair king

A forceful diarrhea blowout that gets on the toilet seat, tank, walls, etc.

*History - The worst episode of this type occurred in the restroom of Chair King casual furniture store. It is likely that the perpetrator of this original event is included (by photo) on their "don't let this person in" list.

"I pulled a chair king in there. You'll want to use the restroom upstairs."

by Ed Bodine March 25, 2008

47๐Ÿ‘ 13๐Ÿ‘Ž


Unicorn chair

Watching a 17 year old spin around in a unicorn chair for 5 minutes straight

Unicorn chair

by Firecatmew September 8, 2021

10๐Ÿ‘ 1๐Ÿ‘Ž


chair nazi

Jack asses who steal your chair when you get up

You damn chair nazi, i was just sitting here

by Inuttei May 21, 2005

42๐Ÿ‘ 12๐Ÿ‘Ž


Asshole Chair

The chairs located throughout a store where the unfortunate male who gets roped into shopping with a female companion ends up sitting. The hapless male usually ends up waiting for hours, and often while an important sporting event is on.

Yvonne: I'll be in the bra section.
Rachel: I'll be in the shoe department.
L: I'll be in the asshole chair, twiddling my thumbs and plotting how to get in your respective pants.

by Dr. Zoid Johnberg August 17, 2007

4828๐Ÿ‘ 2212๐Ÿ‘Ž


sneako chair

That one random chair in every seedy hotel room. There's only ever one. It's not for sitting, its for watching your girl get gangbanged. A reference to the "red pill" influencer Sneako publically admitting on a podcast, that he willfully watched his girl get passed around by random strange men, multiple times.

Brock: Hey chad, the varsity team's running a train on Sara this weekend at the motel.
Chad: oh yeah? Tom's gonna be in the sneako chair again?
Brock: Ever since Frank's eyebrows tickled his balls, Tom can't seem to find anywhere else to sit!

by Ecclesies March 20, 2023

20๐Ÿ‘ 2๐Ÿ‘Ž


burping the chair

Pushing your ass down repeatedly into the cushin of a chair after farting into it repeatedly.

Dickbob thought it was safe to come back into the room, but I was burping the chair and chased his ass back out.

by Jim Koury October 22, 2006

12๐Ÿ‘ 2๐Ÿ‘Ž