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Used to represent extreme exitement or suprise.
See Screaming Jesus On A Ferris Wheel
Easy term to explain the crucifiction of the son of God.
"Screaming Jesus on a Stick!!"
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when a religious person realizes a non-religious (or religious) person is in need of God's love and help, they say this to tell them to come over to christianity (or to re-find God).
Also could be something said in the bed, if ya know what I mean ...
1. James, you suicide! Come to Jesus!
2. Oh, baby, come to Jesus, COME TO JESUS!
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Jesus vs Muhammad
The Ultimate Wrestling match!
Jesus vs Muhammad
Jesus never used violence.
Muhammad used violence.
Jesus used love.
Muhammad murdered, killed and used hate.
Jesus did not take any wives.
Muhammad wallowed in wife after wife, even taking children as his wives.
Jesus did not steal.
Muhammad stole and robbed caravans.
Jesus did not force conversions.
Muhammad forced conversions using the sword.
Jesus was a pacifist in spreading his word.
Muhammad used war to spread his word.
Jesus was poor.
Muhammad was rich.
If Muhammad is opposite to everything Jesus was… Think about this… Jesus had a direct line to God, who was Muhammad speaking to?
Jesus spoke directly to God.
Muhammad spoke directly to ……?
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When you are so drunk you start swinging at anybody in sight
"If i drink anymore of this Remy Martin i'll be "SLAP BOXIN JESUS"
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When the church or a person are actually fucking themselves over.
Jesus fucking Christ, it's like he's fucking himself in the ass while sucking his own dick!
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A place so remote, it's not even in East Jesus.
At least East Jesus would be a town. We're out in Unincorporated Jesus County.
Operating or being a passenger in or on a water/land vehicle at such a velocity or in such a precarious way that the result in losing control of the vehicle and/or simply crashing would result in an inevitable fatality, which would lead to you meeting Jesus himself, hence the term.
For example: Going over 85/90mph on the highway would most likely be considered going Mach Jesus due to the fact that a sudden stop at that speed would kill the passengers of the vehicle. Doing dangerous stunts at high speeds and/or going more than double in a residential, although probably not fatal for the passengers, could be considered Mach Jesus.
Going so fast in a speed boat that colliding with another would not only destroy the boat but more than likely kill the passengers.
“Ahhhhh! Carl! The fuck are you doing?”
“I’m going Mach Jesus!”
“You just went Mach shit yourself.”