care bear shares

Stock that doesn't exist.

Mark was horrified when he found out he had purchased care bear shares.

26👍 5👎

Big Bear Lake

The only good part of the 909. Great place to snowboard, ski, or just go out on the lake. Some parts can be kinda touristy though.

My family owned a cabin in Big Bear Lake when I was growing up. We would drive there from San Diego for the weekend every couple of months.

46👍 11👎

that blows dead bears

when something sucks so far beyond normal. after all, what could suck worse than blowing a dead bear? Not much. Used in Western Canada and parts of Ontario.

"Heard you got busted at the border for pot. that really blows dead bears,eh?"

42👍 10👎

Sarah Bear Foot

When you get dirty, black feet indoors regardless of whether you've been wearing socks, shoes, or just taken a shower. This pedestrian condition is quite contagious in that you can develop "the dirty foot" just by being in close proximity with an afflicted carrier.

Showers are of no avail. Sarah Bear Foot scoffs at shower scrubs and pumice stones. All barefoot trespassers beware.

Sarah was often confused with a circus entertainer that walked barefoot on hot coals. It turns out she just had a bad case of Sarah Bear Foot.

10👍 1👎

Rapist Polar Bear

A polar bear that raped your mom. Everything bad is generally blamed on this polar bear.

bf/gf broke up with you "rapist polar bear must've told them about the other guy/girl"

door/locker was unlocked "rapist polar bear was hiding in there last night"

10👍 1👎

Sleepy Old Bear

Getting head while playing Call of Duty (only counts if the game is call of duty)

Dude i was playin video games and my girl came over....she gave me a sleepy old bear. and my ratio shot through the roof.

10👍 1👎

Death By Bear

Death by Cumplosion from a bear.

These are called Horny bears. They sneak in your house at night and take you in your sleep.

If you dont die from the sheer mass of fur on you, or the 18-20 inch Bear dick in you, the cumplosion will Surely kill you.

38 reported cases 0 Survivors.

Person 1: Hey what happend at the jeffersons?
Person 2: Oh god a group of Horny bears snuck in, and well... Lets just say they didnt go out looking pretty.
Person 1: Oh god, Death by bear is never a way to go out.

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