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Well, some beavers made a dam. They found maple syrup. Then the mounties came and ate them. Then the country of Canada was founded, and to this day uses clams as currency.
canada's history more like canaduh
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Something American's wished they had.
Ba-boom!
Canadian's are better than American's. Accept it and move on. Read a self-help book. Any thing is possible. You hate us so much because you secretly love us. It's okay. We love you too, just not in that way.
"Canadian history is so much better. They abolished slavery before we did, aren't religious assholes and don't care if you're a dude that marries another dude. Hell, you could blow the smoke of your joint in a police officer's face and he would just have to groove off of it because in Canada carrying a g of weed is whatever. Pretty cool, right?"
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An unspeakable sex act involving reenacting the most important parts of Canadian history. Let's just say, someone plays the Queen, and the other person has to ask permission to secede at some point towards the end.
Also involved: Question Hour in the House of Commons.
"Man, we were working on a Canada's History, and she got all Stephen Harper on my ass."
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Canada's History is summed up as Two Girls in a cup, Tub Girl, The Stanley Cup, Bottle of Maple Syrup, Beavers, Moose Antlers, and Rocky and Bullwinkle all having sex while watching Stargate.
The most horrific thing you could possibly imagine, Canada's History.
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It begins fairly normally, with a man receiving a blowjob (from an individual of any sex). The man ejaculates into the Stanley cup, previously filled with a bottle of maple syrup. The man should swirl the mixture with his penis until it has a thick consistency.
The next step is to apply the mixture to the blowee's head. Once applied, put the antlers on their head so the dried semen/syrup mixture will act as an adhesive.
To wrap it up, wrap the man's meat in some Canadian Bacon, grab a brewsky and fuck the night away with your new moose.
Steven: Man, you look exhausted!
John: I sure am! Ann and I tried out Canada's History last night because I was super horny.
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One day America took a shit and put it on it's head. The end. Canada.
Canada's History, eh?
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A sex act so depraved, it must never be described. First referenced on the Colbert report.
Guy 1: Dude, i totally reviewed Canada's History with that girl.
Guy 2: Dude, you need help.
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