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The most powerful man in the world save one, the person who defeated him in mortal combat upon the slopes of mount olympus. The Incarnate of Zues, king of the gods, known only as Souther, managed to dodge one of Chuck Norris'
roundhouse kicks, and punched him in the face, defeating him. However even though it was mortal combat, Chuck Norris still lives, and Souther was so impressed with his god-fighting abilities that he retired from fighting, and became a latin teacher.
(There is also some speculation that this "Souther" was Chuck Norris in disguise and moved so fast that it apeared to observers that there were two people.)
Student: "my teacher fought Chuck Norris and won"
Uninformed Student: "No, nobody can beat Chuck Norris"
Student: "no, for real, they trained at the same dojo, and my teacher beat him in a spar"
Uninformed Student: "no way! He'd have to be like Zeus or something"
*Uninformed Student explodes because he is simultaniously hit by a lightening bolt and Chuck Norris, who greatly respects the only man to ever defeat him*
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used when one is completely sure about something
A: what time does the bus leave?
B: At 5:25
A: Are you sure?
B: Yes.
A: Are yo chuck-norris-sure?
B: Yes
"I am so scared of Chuck Norris!"
"Nobody blames you, man, fear of Chuck Norris is everybody's phobia"
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the physical embodiment of awesome
hi you look chuck norris today dude
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You cannot find Chuck Norris, but you may aswell try.
Step 1: Go onto Google.com
Step 2: Type 'Find Chuck Norris'
Step 3: Click on the 'I'm Feeling Lucky' button.
Step 4: Run.
Finding Chuck Norris is the cause of a series of health problems.
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an awesome, kickass, bad mothafucka. Some facts:
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
Chuck Norris likes to knit sweaters. And when I say knit, I mean kick. And when I say sweaters, I mean babies.
Before the Boogeyman goes to sleep, he checks in his closet and under his bed for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris is 10 feet tall, weighs 2 tons, breathes fire, could eat a hammer, and can take a shotgun blast standing.
There is no creationism. There is no evolution. There are only the species that Chuck Norris has allowed to survive.
Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparallelled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was complete, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and stole his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, admits he should have seen it coming and couldn't stay mad for long. The now play poker every tuesday.
Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. That has nothing do do with his ancestry. The man ate a whole indian.
Chuck Norris has a word for people he puts in a coma--"lucky."
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Chuck Norris fun facts 2
Chuck Norris doesn't work his jobs pay him for just applying.
Chuck Norris was once George Bush...but now he's Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris is the only man capable of masturbating and running a marathon at the same time.
Chuck Norris created the first computer using the bones of his enemies.
Chuck Norris invented the lightbulb.
Chuck norris invented the question mark.
JK rowling was originally going to be a porn star but due to her not being able to handle Chuck Norris she soon became an author inspired by Norris' naked body thus making Harry Potter.
Due to Chuck Norris' awesome roundhosue kicks he wasn't allowed to play in terminator 3 instead he turned himself into a woman just to star in it.
If Chuck was to ever discover this website he would roundhouse kick the earth thus ending humanity.
During the Cold War nuclear missles were actually launched at America Due to a swift Roundhouse kick Chuck Norris redirected them to Japan thus creating Godzilla!
Waldo isn't hiding he's in a coma after saying Chuck Norris three times in the mirror.
Only Chuck Norris can masturbate to Chuck Norris.
French fries were invented since Chuck Norris got tired of potatoe wedges.
After shaving his pubic hairs Chuck Norris then threw them into the furnace thus making the first werewolf.
Chuck Norris REALLY killed Kenny!
When Carlos Mencia made a joke about Chuck Norris he went from white to mexican due to a radioactive roundhouse kick.
When Lynyrd Skynyrd made the song Free Bird he was actually singing about the time Chuck Norris decided not to Roundhosue kick him.
Chuck Norris doesn't get married he just ensures that death will do them apart.
All that remains was formed After Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the rest of the band.
Chuck Norris IS the first airplane.
Chuck Norris wnats YOU to join the army!
Chuck Norris is the reason why Uncle Sam doesn't exist!
If everyone was Chuck Norris the world would no longer exist!
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