vacuum-packed cows

A vacuum-packed cow can be found in most fields in Britain throughout autumn and winter. Many believe that the large cylinder black bags are full of hay, but that is an urban legend. Inside these mysterious bags are on average three vacuum-packed cows. These cows have been dehydrated and vacuum packed in order to keep them safe until spring. If you had ever wondered why there were a lot less cows in the fields in winter, you now know. Obviously not all cows are vacuum-packed, as it is still a new technology, and can be dangerous to cows, or require them to have months of therapy afterwards.

Farmer Brown started vacuum-packing his cows around October, so they could get used to their vacuumed environment.

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kentucky vacuum cleaner

1. The act of sucking a dick until it's purple while the male is eating KFC.

2. The act of putting your significant others genitals in a vacuum cleaner while giving anal. This usually involves 2 males. Then after the process, you both enjoy a bucket of popcorn chicken.

3. The act of getting a blowjob while your significant other is shitting in a bucket of KFC and then eating it afterwards and feeding it to each other.

Bro, my friend John and I did the Kentucky Vacuum Cleaner last night. It was awesome.

I Want A Vacuum

When mouthed at a friend, lover, or stranger, they will get the impression that you are saying "I want to f**k you." An array of reactions including laughs, awkward blank stares and drooling will follow.

Kathryn: (mouthed) "I want a vacuum"
Mark: "I want to f**k you too"
Kathryn: "Wait, WHAT?!?!"

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Vacuum My Sausage

The most awkward way possible to ask someone to give you a blow-job. This would be one of the most inappropriate and incorrect ways of asking for one.

"I think that creep is hitting on me. Can we please leave?"
"What did he say?"
"Vacuum My Sausage."
"Oh god. Let's get out of here.."

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Drilling vacuum cleaner

When you are fucking your partner who is on their period and you summon all your strength to turn your knob into a vacuum cleaner and suck up the period

Bruh I turned into a drilling vacuum cleaner last night in bed

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White Willy Vacuum

When someone snorts crack off of a penis.

"She did a white willy vacuum on that guy at the party"

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Mexican Vacuum Cleaner

During sex the female’s asshole will suck on the males penis super hard until it starts losing circulation, and eventually falls off

Karla gave me the phatest Mexican vacuum cleaner last night, I had to go to the hospital