Yoinking the Hog

A term that refers to "jacking off" or masturbating. Yoinking refers to the actual action, while the hog refers to the penis and is a common way to refer to such.

Terry: So, what'd you do all weekend.
Peter: Ah, I was yoinking the hog.

Yoinking my Schploink

The wacky way to describe jerking your meat.

Fred: Why didn't you come with us to the party?
Bob: I was too busy yoinking my schploink.