Vice President I'd Like to Fuck

"Vice President I'd Like (to) Fuck"
Vice President, whether married, separated or divorced, that a male individual sees as physical attractive enough to want to have sexual intercourse with them.

A "Vice President I'd Like to Fuck" is any Vice President that is sexually desirable.

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I'd rather shower at Penn State

An extreme reluctance to doing something.

Man, Sundays are depressing. I'd rather shower at Penn State then go to work tomorrow.

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I'd wear a hat on a day like that

A cautionary platitude expressing the frustrations and/or ambivalence towards a situation; an exclamation of humanity's futility in the face of insurmountable insanity, stupidity, or all-around wretchedness.

- Do you ever have one of those days when you can't begin to justify having gotten out of bed?
- I'd wear a hat on a day like that!

- Kevin's coming back from vacation on Monday, and he will be pissed!
- Wow, I'd wear a hat on a day like that!

- Hey Jerry, how's it going?
- Ugh, I had an 8:30 meeting with Bill yesterday.
- Ooof, I'd wear a hat on a day like that!

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I'd shadow her/his cabinet

An expression of lust about a member of parliament in the UK. Preferably (though not necessarily) in the opposition party.

Usage: <Exclamation>, <Member of Parliament> I'd shadow her/his cabinet

Example:
Pwoar, Nicola Blackwood - I'd shadow her cabinet anyday.
Jeremy Hunt - I'd love to shadow his cabinet.

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Toothpaste, I'd use her shit as

Term of affection about a third party

I love her so much I'd use her shit as toothpaste

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I'd have your ass in a casket

An expression used when someone asks a hateful or hurtful question or does something hateful, drastic, etc.

See also: I will fight you. Right in the face., i will cut you, I WILL BUST YOU, or I will choke you with your own asshole!!!.

Girlfriend: "What would you do if I cheated on you?"
Boyfriend: "I'd have your ass in a casket."

or

Guy #1: "I'm going to fuck your girlfriend."
Guy #2: "I'll have your ass in a casket!"

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I'd rather shave my eyeballs

A useful analogy for describing a complete refusal to partake in an activity.

Tate: Hey, hon, that guy that refuses to speak to you, you need to take your relationship to the next level. Right now it's in the awkward stages, but with a little work I know you could make things work. You need to hang around his work place and home and once he sees how commited you are to him, he'll change his mind.
Tammy: Right, Tate, hun. I'd rather shave my eyeballs.