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When you fuck a girl after you dip your dick in holy water once and then do it again so it's like a holy Second coming of Jesus.
Amit: Damn bro, I pulled The Second Coming of Jesus with Chloe last night.
Ashwin: Nice Bro!!!!
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A catch phrase designed to capitalize on the up surge of fad-ish Jesus freaks inspired by The Passion Of The Christ.
The phrase Jesus is my homeboy is very superficial.
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you need jesus is the name of a local rug installer
tired of that hard wood flooring raising the cost of insulation you need jesus can help 666 777 0909
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-The son of God who died on the cross so that everyone's sins could washed away.
-Was the only human being to ever walk the earth without giving in to sin. The rest of us have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.
-Loves us so much even though we continue to sin and disregard the ten commandments.
-in this day and age, the world and all its material possessions + the devil blind us from the truth!
-the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak.
When atheists or non-Christians are on their deathbeds, they will realise then that the Lord Jesus Christ is real and that he is the way/truth and life.
Dear Lord Jesus Christ,
Thankyou for dying on the cross for us!
Please forgive the sins that we have committed and help us to forgive those who have sinned against us.
In Jesus wonderful name we pray,
Amen.
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a phrase used to replace the word ridiculous when the situation or topic is beyond ridiculous and ridonkulous
So right when I was about to cum I pulled out and donkey punched her.
..For the love of hopscotching jesus..really?
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Much like a regular "handle" of liquor, a Jesus-handle is any quantity greater than 1.75 L of top-tier liquor. It is a colloquial for people who avoid the Godless metric system, and believe that sermons are best preached from atop a bar-stool.
"Sorority sisters just can't hold a candle
to the St. Mary's girls when they grab my Jesus-Handle."
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Jesus Christ Superstar was a 1972 musical co-written by Mel Gibson and Jesus Christ himself. Gibson wrote much of the music, while Christ wrote the script.
Gibson and Christ got the basic idea for the musical while on drink/drug binge in Tijuana, Mexico. While intoxicated on codeine, marijuana, cheap tequila, and crack cocaine, Contrary to popular belief, crack wasn't invented by the CIA in the 1980s to keep black people down. Gibson first synthasized it in 1967, then distributed it himself for the same purposes Gibson blurted that he wanted to make a musical about the life of the Christ. Gibson forgot his idea in the morning, as he passed out in a Tijuana jail, but Christ remembered. Gibson, at first, was opposed to his own idea, but upon learning of his approxomatley $20,000 debt to Mexican drug kingpins he quickly signed on to the project.
Gibson wrote all of the music for the play in less than three weeks. It took Christ more than two months to write lyrics, which began to frustrate Mel. When Gibson saw the plot, he thought of it as an overy pompous representation of hubris, and told Jesus that if He didn't change it, he would leave the project. He loved Christ, but not that much.
Gibson fufilled his promise, quitting the project. In a fit of rage, he drafted his hit movie The Passion of the Christ as an attack against his ex-partner. As opposed to the flattering play he and Jesus co-wrote, The Passion pretty much showed Christ getting His ass kicked up and down the block for two straight hours.
Jesus Christ Superstar was a huge critical success, but the general public was unable to appreciate the work. The failure of the play started a chain of events, Jesus spent the rest of his life in bitter desperation, struggling with substance abuse, an addiction to pornography, and backstabbing Jews trying to nail him to a 2x4.
It was really John Lennon's boisterous comments that did him in though, when the Romans came to get him, his heart just wasn't in it.
"This was the musical that made me want to go into writing plays. Oh, well, this and RENT, but still."
~ Oscar Wilde on Jesus Christ Superstar
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