Someone whom fucked your mom just to go to the grocery store and 8 years later you still needs some milk.
Dad: I’ll Ben right back son we’re out of milk
8 years later
Son: Bitch where mah milk at
Dad has kids with his wife. He always tells dumb jokes but can be nice and funny at times. Doesn’t like spending a lot of money even tho we have plenty of it. We live very cheap his kids are not allowed to flush the toilet and after his kids are done In the bath he saves the bath water.
Dad: when I was young I looked at the moon
Son: I know
A name for someone who goes to buy milk for decades and never comes back.
My dad went to buy milk... 23 years ago
Non existent, always leaves, pricks in general, cunts, don’t give a fuck, don’t know the meaning of loving your child, there children are not prioritised.
A family member that is usually non-existent, obsessed with white stuff such as milk and cocaine.
Since your dad is slow in the head, it will take him about 5 minutes to realize he doesn't have enough money to buy the milk. Going to
work, guessing about 30 miles from the store in the opposite direction of your house, it takes him, with the given 0.05 mph, about 600 hours or 0.07 years, to get to his work.
That is if, and only if, a cop does not pull over your father for the 200th time for diving immensely slow. It would be a usual sentence of fewer than 30 days. However, your father has been there a lot and the judge has had enough of your father being a public nuisance. This makes the judge sentence your father to jail time for 50 years. Worst-case scenario, your father is sentenced to a lifetime jail residence so make that infinite years.
However, let's not think that way. He gets to work and has to work for the listed 950, 000 days (roughly 2666.67 years). Getting back to the store will take another 0.07 years, buying the milk will take about 50 more years with the state your father's mind is in. Finally, it will take another 697.01 years to get home.
Totaled up, this is an approximate 4160.83 years for your father to come back home with the milk. Unfortunately, the milk is spoiled by the time he gets home, unless it's the special "Never Go Bad Milk" brand, which is probably not the case since your father probably read the label wrong and got the "Goes Bad in 3 Seconds Milk" brand instead. Thus repeating the never-ending cycle.
Nope. This isn’t a joke. I’m not one of those ten year olds who says “LOL NO MILK NO DAD!1!1!!11!1!!1” ok so a dad is a guy who gets u ice cream and tells jokes and can be good like 86% of dads but some can be uhhhh yeah…..
Kid: can we get McDonald’s
Dad: yes