Random
Source Code
Random
When they hold a prayer event at your school and they give free pizza if you sit through it.
Person 1.) Aw man I have to deal with the free pizza jesus people today!
Person 2.) Well at least we get some quality pizza.
Person 1.) But they are so fucking annoying!
4👍 2👎
A term used to describe someone very old.
This lady was so old she must have been Jesus' prom date.
OR
That guy was so old he knew Jesus' prom date.
3👍 2👎
Some people in Alabama who are crazy and learn karate for Jesus. They are Pentecostal Crazies and speak in tongues. It's like Karate For Christ or something. It's freaky in a bad bad way.
onlooker#1: Dude, they just beat the shit out of that Hindu.
onlooker#2: Yeah, it's those crazy guys that do kung-fu for Jesus.
3👍 2👎
Clever retort applied where "That's what she said" could have been. Or even sometimes where it wouldn't be, the possibilities are endless.
"I'm just gonna hang around here for a while"
-"that's what Jesus said"
29👍 48👎
When some shit so amazing happened that you would've had to have been there, otherwize no one would belive you if you told them.
1.
Omar: Holy shitz Robert!!!
Robert: Zombie jesus on a pogostick, did you see that?!
Omar: that nigga just got blasted by a racoon(actual
animal) holding a hand gun!!
2.
Tim: Zombie jesus on a pogostick nic r u ok?!
Nic: I had no idea my penis could bend that way
3.
Breanne: zombie jesus on a pogo stick did Tim just eat an 8x8
Gina: yeah to bad its not a hamburger
21👍 33👎
It is the Super Soaker. To have one destroys the purpose of Super Soakers in the first place. It is the epitome of Super Soaking. One with a Jesus Super Soaker will automatically win all Super Soaker battles.
Bob: Hey, Nate just got the Jesus Super Soaker.
Jayme: This is gay. Lets go play Pokemon.
5👍 5👎
When having a face to face with someone and you notice only one eye is looking at you, the other seems to wander off. Maybe it notices something else going on...that's a Creapin Jesus!
Me: "Dude, I can't tell if he's looking at me or not."
Shawn: "Yea, that's a Creapin Jesus."
1👍 7👎