Random
Source Code
Random
To go on a pointless drive.
Specifically against all recommended advice and especially when feeling unwell.
"Despite there being a global pandemic, and all medical advice and governmental regulation (which I helped to write) saying to the contrary, I had to go to Barnard Castle.
This trip needlessly put in danger anybody I may inadvertently have come across due to my families recent exposure to Covid-19. I needlessly took this drive because I recklessly drove the 270miles from London to Durham and had to check whether I was safe to take the pointless 270 mile journey home again."
A lie so obviously false no one could possibly believe it.
"The NHS is perfectly safe in tory hands"
I think you should take the "barnard castle eye test" mate
When you are potentially blind and drive a ~60 mile round trip between Durham and Barnard Castle with your family to validate that you can see properly
That Coronavirus was a stinker - better risk my family with the old Barnard Castle Eye Test before I drive back to London
The funniest person you'd meet. LMAOOOOO JKJK and ugly lookin cutie. they prolly smell like spoiled milk and eat boogers
"Yo Azriel Barnard came over to my house"
"Ew they stink"
Getting caught out by your partner for using outlandish excuses.
Totally caught Ben Barnard-castling last night when he tried to bluff his way out of why he didn’t have dinner ready. His excuse was downright pathetic!
When a man takes a shit on another man, slaps it, and then licks up them mess after whilst both participants are wearing clogs
Man 1: Hey babe, wanna do a jack barnard?
Man 2: Sure, but let me put down a towel first because last time you stained the walls