the day when zombie Jesus comes back to life to pretend to be a bunny who gives out eggs for some reason
"Happy Easter!"
30๐ 32๐
The day when a giant bunny sneaks into every house in America and gives it's unhatched children to other children who will end up eating them
Me: (goes downstairs) AHHHHHHHH WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT THING!
Mom: That's the Easter bunny son, he's only trying to give out candy
Me: Why the hell is it giving out it's eggs? I thought bunnies didn't even lay eggs
Mom: Oh honey, of course they do. They just... Oh look it's already gone!
Me: What but it was only here for 20 seconds.
Mom: Oh son, The Easter bunny has to go fast in order to get to every house in America
4๐ 2๐
Spanish word meaning: Mexicans to the park!
Wow, the park is full of Mexicans. It must be easter.
30๐ 41๐
A holiday that doesnt make sense.
person A: How should we celebrate Jesus coming back from the dead?
Person B: HOW BOUT EGGS?
Person A: I don't see what that has to do with---
Person B: DON'T WORRY, theres a bunny!
Easter doent make any fuckin sense!
18๐ 23๐
n. A roided up keebler elf who wont be able to hack it in Varsity Football and abuses young girls.
Did you see that Easter taking it up the butt from those upper classmen?...Man he'll never make it past camp Cocoa...What a friggin douche.
43๐ 71๐
something that jacked up kindergardeners fed their parents, and evenually the whole world, convinsing them that we should have another holiday devoted to eating choclate.
super intelligent kindergardener:
you are getting sleepy...
now, when i snap my fingers you will believe that a stupid holiday called easter exists, and you will spend it doing and believing the following...
30๐ 47๐
The time of year when you get a free mug with your chocolate.
Great- another cadburys mug with my easter egg.
17๐ 25๐