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The saddest excuse for a cookie. Ever.
I thought I had cookies in my lunch, but Mom gave me frickin' fig newtons damnit.
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An artsy, stuck up jerk with hipster hair who is full on himself and believes he is a master of his craft; but isn’t. Usually named Brennen, Duke, Enzo, Hoist, or Damion.
My hairdresser is such a fig newton.
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A wierd sexual fetish were someone shits into a condom and the slaps it across the other participants face, causing the condom to break and covering there face with shit
"too bad for you, you lost the bet, so i'll go get the laxitive"
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A nickname for the new Camel Infused cigarettes. These cigarettes taste quite similar to thee Fig Newton.
we be smokin' dem fig newtons.
will someone bum me a fig newton.
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a comback after u say something to ones mom
guy:guess wat
girl:wat?
guy:ur mom oo fig newton
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Fig newtons are ambiguous, they're not biscuits/cookies and they're not fruit, thus:
1) A fig newton is a noun that defines a relationship that is more than just being "friends with benefits." You have sex but you actually have feelings for each other, you are emotionally dependent on each other but it's not (yet) love, and for some reason (i.e geographical distance, availability, commitment issues, etc), you two have chosen to not be in an exclusive relationship.
2) A fig newton is for a relationship you have with someone that you cannot categorize as "just friends," "fuck buddies," "friends with benefits, or "boyfriend/girlfriend."
"Hey, so what's going on with that guy that you were seeing?"
"Oh, he moved to NYC. We still have feelings for each other and have sex when we see each other though. But we're not in a relationship or anything"
"What do you call those things?"
"Oh, he's my fig newton (n)." or "We're fig newtons (pl)"
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this means that you are looking to hook up.. I want to fuck you
If mouthed silently this looks like I want to fuck you so mouth the word I want a fig newton at someone you want to hook up with
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