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n. a roll of toilet paper.
"Give me some of your ghetto kleenex!" Jovan said.
A tissue-cum mixture created by masturbation.
I have a tissue shortage because Tim made a kleenex baby in my bathroom!
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The act of, while in the act of cunnilingus, taking the girl's labia and mimicking the action of blowing your nose.
Man, last night I gave Krystal the Pink Kleenex... she didn't go for it.
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When a guy is about to ejaculate from masturbating, he readies a "kleenex condom" - in other words, wraps tissue paper over the top of his dick, as to catch the semen and prevent making a mess.
It is named "kleenex condom" because it involves the use of facial tissue - Kleenex being a popular brand, and serves a similar function of a condom because it catches ejaculate, however Kleenex tissues could never actually serve the purpose of a real condom, and kleenex condoms SHOULD NOT be used as a prophylactic for sexual intercourse.
Jimmy yanked his Jimmy and then felt like he was about to come, so he quickly grabbed some tissue paper and made a kleenex condom on his ding-a-ling.
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A Dirty Kleenex is a complicated professional sex move. In order to successfully complete a Dirty Kleenex, one must dangle a woman's head, torso, and arms out a 2nd story or higher window, while having vaginal or anal sex with her. Traditionally, it must be an office building, but looser definitions allow any building with at least two levels. Upon climax, the man must ejaculate into the woman (thus making her "dirty"), and then toss her out the window, as one would toss a dirty kleenex into the trash.
"God, I'm so sad Lindsay died."
"Did you hear what happened?"
"No. What?"
"Jimmy did the Dirty Kleenex with her."
"What? She wasn't even a professional."
"She wasn't even a professional."
A nod to last night's episode of "The Office."
A pair of shoes made out of kleenex boxes that a man wears when he's missing his only pair of shoes.
Scott: What was up with Alfred's shoes? Were those kleenex?
David: No, they were kleenex shoes!
Scott: What the hell are those?
David: They're something Alfred turns to when he loses his shoes. At least he's wearing shoes, right?
Scott: Right!
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stop gazing at me and go clobber the kleenex asshole!
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