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Lakewood, NJ is a small, quaint town in NJ where you can find just about every type of person. From Bougie ass Black families to extremely gentrifying Othodox Hasidic Jews to Mexicans, to trashy ass white people. There is literally nothing to do in this town. Everybody knows each other. The moment you get on Route 9, everyone will flock to you and immediately be all up in your business. If you're queer and you're born here, move out as fast as you can. News of your queerness will spread everywhere even if you only whispered it in the many wooded areas of this town once. If you like boring mediocrity & low price housing, and the only form of entertainment is being up someone's asshole about Lakewood is for you!
Person 1: Ugh, fuck I've gotta drive through Lakewood, NJ.
Person 2: Oh god. I hope you didn't masturbate 3 months ago when he clock hit 2:25:26 AM, because they'll know.
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In Lakewood, California, you could walk down the street at night and be pretty damn, safe. the cops are ALWAYS driving around, however, they will not stop you. run a few red lights, stop signs, whatever! they don't care. lakewood is also becomming a Compton drop off. Lakewood High school may not be too gehtto, cause they have the black kids who act white, but mayfair high is pretty ghetto. it's manily the blacks, mexicans and asians, while Lakewood hs is manily the white folk. particularly the "BROS" and "BROHOES" whom are the DGAFing white kids who get drunk on a weekly basis, drive white trucks, go to the lake or the river or whatever them white kids call it, and dont associate with anyone but their own kind. Bro's usually chill with their hot ass guy friends and always have an ugly BUTTER FACE hanging around. Typically, its a trashy younger sister or just a trashy girl period. talk about BJ fest! Lakewood is the kind of city where you see hott girls almost every where and it has an all girls catholic hs. which means drunk ass rich girls GALORE! Btw, sure most lakewood teens get drunk but boy oh boy, the pot use is INSANE! not too much havy stuff though, just a whole lotta BEER PONG and crazy WEEED! In the 'L-WOOD" which the wanna beee ghetto acting kids call it, you could never starve, they have mc donalds, carls jr's and starbucks up the ass! everywhere you turn you'll find one of those. we also have a lotta parks which the skater kids (and there's a LOT of skaters and wanna bee skaters) go after dark to shred it up and get high. and don't worry about the curfew, remember, the cops dont care! Moreover, Lakewood is a fun place to be if you're a teenager. Hot girls, hot guys, boooze and no rules!
On a warm night in lakewood CA, the street behind you is having an insanely loud party with a crappy DJ playing old ass music. It's almost midnight and your grandparents are trying t sleep and your little brother is pretty sick. You call the Lakewood Sheriff and they act all concerned. you wait attentively at your window to see those A-HOLE neighbords get busted (because they are underaged and drinking a hole lotta liquor) but to no avail: the cops never show. Its now 12:30 at night and the music is even louder and the DJ is now taunting the neighbor hood shouting : "Ya'll M*THER F*CKERS cant stop this uh huh!" and so tou call the polica once again and they tell you, oh im sorry somene will be there shortly. At 2:00am, they finnally come...when EVERYONE is leaving. Tish Tisk Lakewood Cops. Tisk Tisk
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One of the coolest highschools in America. It's in Lakewood, Ohio though, so there are alot of gays, but other than that its awesome. It sports purple and gold as it's colors, and the mascot is the Ranger Man. There are many different types of people here: emos, wiggers, preps, you name it, LHS has it. Most of the teachers are awesome, except for Mrs Gabriel, she is hated by everyone. Theres alot of stoners, and alot of em smoke in the lunchroom. In this school you only get a detention for that. A DETENTION. FOR DRUGS. It's also the place where the girls are either totally prude or so slutty they get gang-banged every day (they're mostly slutty though). Alot of the girls are very beautifull and will most likely become models (or pornstars for the slutty ones). We also have ALOT of ghetto kids, where the middle and upper class kids are kind of rare. Most of our sports teams are pretty bad, but the band is really good, they even performed at the Cotton Bowl in Dallas, Texas. It's also the one school you can go to and actually have fun.
Kid 1-"Man I love Lakewood Highschool, too bad our basketball team is 3-11 though"
Kid2-"Who cares, it's Lakewood Highschool. That automatically makes us the best"
Douschebag-"Man fuck lakewood its full of a whole bunch of fags"
Cool kid (that goes to lakewood high)-"shut the fuck up, Lakewood will kick you school's ass!"
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Any graduate of Lakewood High School in Lakewood, California.
Backstopbob was a Lakewood Lancer from 1962 to 1964.
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Any graduate of Lakewood High School in Lakewood, California.
Backstopbob was a Lakewood Lancer from 1962 to 1964.
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a place in the central Florida boonies where gullible boomers bought into the idea of suburban sprawl thinking it was special.
Lakewood Ranch scored a 0/100 on Walkscore.com.
The police department of Lakewood Ohio. Lakewood Ohio is a dense suburb in North East Ohio bordering Cleveland. It has a high population of extremist liberals, hipsters, and ghetto trash. Just like the legislation in Lakewood, like the pit bull ban for example, the police are equally idiotic. The Lakewood police are notorious for being typical pigs. They see themselves as a level above citizens, even though they are just citizens themselves, and talk to you as if you are a peasant. Before Lakewood started having large influxes of low income and or unemployed minorities moving in from Cleveland, the police used to openly discriminate against any minorities through brutality and profiling. The Lakewood police will pull up and stop you for crossing in a crosswalk if the light changed and you were still on the road, even if it was literally two more steps to the sidewalk. They will also trespass on your property for lighting a couple firecrackers, during the middle of the day, on the day before the 4th of July and threaten to ticket you and confiscate your fireworks. Those were just two examples of how Lakewood police officers are typical, useless, fart sniffing, arrogant cops.
Lakewood Citizen 1: "Why did I get a ticket for parking in front of my own driveway?"
Lakewood Citizen 2: "That's Lakewood Police for you."
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