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Parched Post

A thirsty, attention-seeking post on social media made intentionally vague to alarm people or just get people to feel bad for them.

Betty checked-in to her doctor's office on FB, vaguely stating, "One of two appointments today." Prompting concerned people to comment "What's going on?" Or "Hope everything is ok." Betty either did not reply or wrote, "PM me." Come on Betty, that was a Parched Post.

Brittany posted on social media last night, "So done with fake people." But she's too chicken to actually name these fake people. Parched Post!

Louise lamented on FB that is was her birthday and no one remembered. Poor Louise. Louise is looking for empty happy birthdays from old classmates and co-workers she hasn't seen in years. What a Parched Post.

by Sweetiegirl77 December 1, 2018


sexually parched

When it's been so long since the last time you had sex, your genitals are all dried up.

"Dude, I'm sexually parched. My girl took the open sign down. She won't let me tap that."

by Mr. R0b0t November 21, 2019


Parched mosquito

A person who hasn't gotten any head in a while

Mr. Mull is a parched mosquito

by Homonotfound February 21, 2023


parched camel

a married women who is still thirsty

"That mother was such a parched camel that she came to me"

by parchedcamel November 3, 2013


Parched Fart

when you have a really airy fart

ugh i just had such a parched fart.

by glue gun stanley April 15, 2019


Pussy Parched

A dry spell but it only applies to the lack of vagina in one's life.

Aaron: Damn, I'm so pussy parched
Hannah: If you don't have a weird clown doll we can work on that

by a.a.ron505 February 6, 2021


Parched Penis

After a long period of not peeing, your next piss includes the sensation of your pee tube becoming wet again after a long while of dryness and urine drought.

Guy 1: Dude, I haven't peed since I got on the plane.

Guy 2: Parched Penis?

Guy 1: Most definitely.

by urbanmonkey7 April 3, 2011

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