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Catholic

A catholic is a person who is the OG Christian and wants to spread peace cough* cough* crusades and wants you to go to church every Sunday

Catholic Karen:hey young man come to our church

Little billy:sorry I’m atheist

Catholic Karen: YOUR GOING TO hell if you don’t go to church

Little billy: starts crying

by Somboi April 14, 2019

12πŸ‘ 18πŸ‘Ž


catholic

Someone who thinks they are better than anybody else because somebody told them so, and they read it in a book.

The Catholic Church is the "Only True Church" How arrogant can these people be?
What about Hundus, Islams, Protestants, Jews, Muslims, Shintos, and the rest of them? Are they all wrong? Are Babtists evil? Is being Episcopilian wrong because Mary isn't a Saint?
Who is right?
Why does the Catholic church proclaim supremacy? Did Jesus declare that?

Would Jesus wear a Rolex on his Television show?

Who seeks the truth?

by Wretchid March 16, 2006

287πŸ‘ 698πŸ‘Ž


catholic

group of people on a neverending question to stop masturbation by scaring kids that they will go to hell

if you do that jesus will send your sinful ass to hell!

by b3n February 15, 2005

293πŸ‘ 702πŸ‘Ž


catholic

A set of beliefs, practices, and rites irrationally maintained by ignorance of the laws of nature or by faith in magic or chance.

My Grandmother is so Catholic that whenever she loses at cards, she turns her Virgin Mary statue towards the wall. That'll show her.

by not named Michael February 3, 2005

266πŸ‘ 640πŸ‘Ž


catholic

A term derived from the Greek words 'cathos' and 'licos'. Cathos refers to male genetelia, while licos refers to rapid tongue movement.

I don't want them Catholics anywhere near my children, especially my boys.

by Peter Long March 22, 2005

248πŸ‘ 625πŸ‘Ž


catholic

The church which sprang up in Rome during the time of Christ but not ordained by him.
In the 1300-1600's anyone who was not Catholic was murdered by these "Godly" people. Yup. Torture chambers, iron maidens, thumbscrews, anal pears, the whole bit. Not to mention beheading and burning at the stake.
The catholics DID NOT however, persecute atheists (surprise?)
Protestant religions, despite getting whacked out of existence as soon as the Catholics found out of their being, finally managed to prosper in the 1600's and eventually found their way to America. Then the Catholics showed up... *chop* *chop*
The Catholics also support homosexual activities. A "live as you please and then confess" lifestyle and such. You can sin all you want and confessing will make it legit.
When monks/priests and other "laymen" take a vow of celebacy, it is only in regards to women, children/young boys are not off limits.

"Man, those catholic schoolgirls look fine with their uniforms! You know she's a freak underneath it all!"
"Dude, you go out with a catholic girl? Your ass woulda been ashes for that not too many years ago"
"So, how long has your little cousin been going to confession? Let's check his anus and see how loose it is, you catch him"

by Clinton Washington May 24, 2006

196πŸ‘ 492πŸ‘Ž


catholic

a religeon were every thing is a sin, even taking a much needed shit.

Bobby: "God dammit mom, i gotta take a SHIT!!!"
Mother: "I'm sorry Bobby, but now that i got a new catholic boyfriend, everything is a sin"
Bobby: "Fuck that!, im goin in!!!"
Boyfriend: "You know your going straight to hell!"

by diseased sheep July 29, 2005

223πŸ‘ 587πŸ‘Ž