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When a man dresses up like Payne Stuart and heads out to pick up chicks. Said golfer/man picks up a slut and brings her to the nearest golf course. He convinces her to have sex in a sand trap. During intercourse, the golfer extracts his penis, dunks it in the sand, and re-inserts...Thus giving her the 'The Dirty Golfer'!
Girl 1) Hey Girl, you've been waddling around like a penguin all morning...what happened sweet heart?
Girl 2) It's kind of embarrassing, but I got 'Dirty Golfered' last night...It is Payne-ful!
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British slang for lesbian.
"Any lady golfers in the audience tonight? "
Jimmy Carr, comedian
Any individual who competes in individual stroke or match play golf tournaments on the regular who is a single digit handicap who has/is verified by the USGA through a honest dedication to put every round into the handicap systems log without vanity. These individuals also play casual golf rounds from usually the most challenging golf tee on any given course.
Golf Club Members Guest:
—Is that who was hitting next to you on the range a good golfer?
Golf Club Member:
—He’s a championship golfer. Let’s go hit some putts before we tee off.
A golfer that averages even par or better during a regulation round of golf WITHOUT cheating. A feat Tiger Woods accomplished as a young boy.
Garrett: "Did you hear that Matt shot a 68 in his tournament today?"
Gene: "Yea, he has shot under par in every tournament this season. He must be a scratch golfer."
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the tan lines left by a golf glove, shorts, golf shoes, and golf polo.
Mike: Why is one hand lighter than the other?
Al: Oh, I've played a lot of golf this year, it's my golfer's tan.
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When something doesn't go your way, and you begin to throw things around, esp. at people. Phenomenon discovered by caddies who realized that rich bratty golfers begin to throw clubs and other equipment at caddies when they play poorly. Very common occurrence at Country Clubs.
Did you see Murphy after he missed his putt? He threw a club at his caddie! A real golfer spasm
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An ellipsis golfer is a person who willingly places themself into situations which are simple to solve for them (but may not be so from the perspective of another person) in order to brag about their success. Background (golf): If the tee and the hole in the game of golf are placed at the two focus points of an ellipse respectively, then it does not matter in which direction the golf player hits the ball, as it will always fall right into the hole given sufficient speed.
Look, this dude is telling kids that their homework is a no-brainer. He is such an ellipsis golfer.