Desk Pop

When you accidentally/prematurely shoot your load during sex.

Sex with Amy was great, but I had a desk pop and now she won't text me back.

2👍 38👎

why is a raven like a writing desk?

A riddle. From the Lewis Carroll classic, Alice In Wonderland. Carroll himself said "the riddle has no answer, unless it does. But it doesn't, however it might." the riddle is unsolved, except in China. They know everthing. It is often used to confuse or befuddle a friend.

Adam:"So why is a raven like a writing desk?"

Charles: O.o

83👍 35👎

Dropped Desk

1. The act of skeeting.

He just dropped desk on her.

Desk Liquor

The secret stash of liquor, vodka, whiskey, etc., that is stored in one's desk to pull out and drink as needed for extremely stressful days at the office.

Today has been rough so I think I'm going to have a shot of my desk liquor to relax.

favorable-desk scramble

Refers to where you unexpectedly get a whole string of several newly-composed UD definitions approved right off, and so you realize that the currently-online submission-judgers are apparently a more-receptive "desk" (as in, "it all depends on whose desk you land on") than the overly-critical/humorless a**h**es who seem to be typically present, and who often heartlessly/flippantly reject many of your perfectly-good and well-worded definitions in favor of stupid/negative/gross/disgusting/smutty submissions that aren't the least bit clever or funny, and which are riddled with misspellings, poor grammar, lousy/unclear wording, etc. So you hastily delve back into your "archives" of previously-rejected definitions and re-submit some of them, in the hopes that these more-fair-minded judgers are still the ones who are "watching" for new submissions, and thus they will approve this latest "crop" from you, as well.

I always try to perform the favorable-desk scramble whenever I have a chance; it's allowed me to get most of my definitions published, some of which I'd been waiting on for months.

Dust my desk

n. The act of masturbation or handjob, or blowjob, titty fuck or combination thereof

I am going to dust my desk today

to desk with

To "desk with" is to get stuck working with someone with whom you've had a sexual relationship, but now despise. For employment purposes, you're willing to "desk with" the individual and keep up appearances.

I had to desk with Bobby for six more months after that scumbag cheated on me with Debbie.