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everyone has a swag count. Your swag (basically coolness) is measured in your swag count. the cooler you are the higher your swag count. it's a bad thing when your swag count runs low. so your swag count is basically a scale on which the amount of swag you have is measured.
Dudeee. your swag count is running dangerously low.
or
This picture of me has a very high swag count!
number of redwoods attributed to a person acording to the redwood scale
Charles is a dick, he has a huge redwood count
When you line up a group of troubled youngsters or gangsters and count them off to decide which one will be forced on a death march. Children are taught this via a lovely nursery rhyme.
1) It's a Goose Count, gather in line!
Something douchebags claim exist even though it doesn't.
1:I want to fuck that girl.
2:No. her bed count is too high.
1:Go fuck yourself.
To pass the time with something not too exciting but not too boring either
-Hey what you up to?
+Just counting the doors in door county, wanna hang?
The number of sexual partners one has been with, especially regarding a man (hence the notch = pussy).
Brad: "Bro I'm twenty and I've already slept with three different bitches."
Chad: "Yo that's nothing I had a 20 notch count by the time I was 16!"
A Romanian with completely wrecked teeth, I'm talking seriously fucked up chompers to the point where it gives you tooth ache just looking at them. The clusterfuck in the Romanians mouth is caused by years of shit eating habits and excessive neediness.
The fuck-wit count snackula tried to drink her blood but settled for a packet of walkers instead.