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what an Asian says while holding a sandal threatening you to death.
"I will send you to Jesus" said Dumbledore calmly.
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You full of shit; you can tell that dung pudding story to someone else!
You need to talk to Jesus! He might forgive you, but I don't!
Cyborg Pirate Ninja Jesus!
Cyborg Pirate Ninja Jesus!
To go kicking evil's ass whenever there's a scare.
He’s got a mean lean katana and some cool facial hair.
And Whenever there is trouble he's gonna be right there!
He’s Cyborg Pirate Ninja Jesus
Cyborg Pirate Ninja Jesus!
Now who’s the Samurai robot who always wins?
The Swashbuckling Savior who’ll absolve your sins?
Who Traveled back in time and chopped off Hitlers head?
Who won the civil war and came back from the dead?
He’s Cyborg Pirate Ninja Jesus!
Cyborg Pirate Ninja Jesus!
In three days time he'll rise again.
When it comes to acting stealthy he scores a ten!
Instead of Chinese stars he throws unlevened bread!
Then he drinks a pint of spirits straight to his head.
He’s Cyborg Pirate Ninja Jesus!
Cyborg Pirate Ninja Jesus!
Who diced up Pol Pot like Teriaki Steak?
Who gave the great Ghangis Kahn all that he could take?
Who used his massive cyborg arm to crush the Axis dead?
Who pumped the Germans in the Rhine full of Pirate lead?
Who kung fu kicks anyone who sells mind altering drugs?
Who'll infect a robber with scurvy for everyone he mugs?
He’s Cyborg Pirate Ninja Jesus!
Cyborg Pirate Ninja Jesus!
Cyborg Pirate Ninja Jesus!
Cyborg Pirate Ninja Jesus!
Cyborg Pirate Ninja Jesus!
Cyborg Pirate Ninja Jesus is better than all other Jesuses.
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Any overlarge multi building mega church compound. Usually they will be adding another building (or ride) at any given time.
I had to go to a wedding at Six Flags Over Jesus, and I had to park in John 6.
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1. an exclamation one would express when frustrated
2. so angry in fact you have no other way to describe it other than yelling this phrase as loud as possible.
wife: "the dishes are dirty, the trash hasn't been taken out, the dogs need to go out, pick up your clothes."
husband: "JESUS GODDAMN FUCKING CHRIST!"
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A phrase used by over enthusiastic Christians when things go wrong, where they work out, what Jesus, son of God would do if he was in your situation, forgetting that they can't do anything that Jesus can do.
Guy: My wife ran away with Judd, I lost my job and now i can't feed my 5000 kids! What would Jesus do?!
Guy 2: Probably use his magic powers to smite the traitor and feed the 5000 kids with a loaf of bread and half a fish...
Guy: Awww shit...
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A phrase most often seen on bumper stickers and t-shirts, it is a variation of the often heard "What Would Jesus Do?" slogan.
The phrase points out the obvious hypocrisy of Christians who support wars, particularly those wars that bomb innocent civilians and create a great deal of collateral damage.
The logic works as follows;
1) Jesus was a pacifist, and taught his followers to be as such. ("turn the other cheek," "love thy enemy," etc.)
2)Christians live by the teachings of Christ.
3)Many, though not all, Christians are the first to support the invasion of other countries, and are, therefore, not acting in a pacifist manner.
4)These Christians are in direct contradiction of the teaching's of Jesus.
5)These Christians (the war mongering Christians) are hypocrites.
In a word, the rejection of war-mongering Christian Conservatism.
Pat Robertson is driving behind a hippie, and see's a bumper sticking asking, "Who Would Jesus Bomb?" Mr. Robertson immediately realizes that he has been in contradiction of his most profound religious beliefs (Christianity) and drives into a wall in shame.
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