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Jesus wears Capri pants, Hawaiian shirts, and loafers with no socks, his beard is on fleek.
When used as an expletive , as in :
"Jesus Christ in Capri Pants, did you see that hipsters fanny pack?"
or
"Jesus Christ in Capri pants, Becky, look at her butt, it is so big!"
Can also be used as a handy hashtag... #JesusChristInCapriPants #fannypack #hipster #beckysbutt #lookatit
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Instead of faking a plausible excuse, a person tells an audacious lie in order to make it known that they just don't want to hang out with you, presumably in order to offend you enough that the situation won't occur again.
Jake: Hey man, you wanna go catch a flick at the old drive-thru?
Jim: Nah dude, I'm having Jesus over for dinner.
Jake: Weak!
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Something so wondrous or unlikely of happening that it has to be a miracle from the baby Jesus himself.
Ice-T's wife, Coco has an ass so glorious that is a miracle from the baby Jesus.
Chuck Norris being elected president would be a miracle from the bJesus.
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Invoking Jesus's name with the awesome power of a catylitic converter.
Jesus cat cracking christ Martha ! All of Bertha's children have 2 left feet !
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Heavy metal music that is considered religious because of the meaning of the lyrics. Usually awesome when played live.
Guy: Hey have you ever heard of Dear Creator?
Girl: Heck yeah! I love that double pedal Jesus metal!
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1.Something you say when something is just unfucking beleiveable.
2.complete shock or excitement.
1.Ellie: holy shit i have chubb rub.
Tim: Sweet jesus in a hail storm thats disgusting.
2."Sweet jesus in a hail storm I found a $5 bill on the ground."
3.*man gets socked in the face*
"Sweet jesus in a hail storm you got fucked up"
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Used in replacement, and carries the same meaning as the commonly spoken phrase "Jesus Christ on a Cross". This is in reference to the guy who played Jesus in "The Passion of the Christ".
"Jesus Jim Caviezel on a Cross, this carrot cake has semen in it!"
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