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Own Goal

When shooting your load whilst masturbating, accidentally getting a portion of sperm in your mouth.

Gareth: What'd you get up to last night man?
Damo: Bro, had the house to myself so I decided to polish one off and dammit I had an Own Goal.
Gareth: Great story mate.

by thishappenedatgas June 27, 2011

2๐Ÿ‘ 4๐Ÿ‘Ž


Couple Goals

Julia and Shaniya

Julia and Shaniya are couple goals

by J๐ŸŒˆโœจ August 4, 2018

2๐Ÿ‘ 13๐Ÿ‘Ž


Rural Field Goal

The act of avoiding roadkill by steering so that your wheels go on either side of the dead animal, which passes harmlessly under your car.

I was driving the back roads the other day, and came across a dead skunk in the road. I didn't want it's stink or road smush on my tires, so I did a rural field goal.

by Kalisiin September 22, 2012


Empty net goal

The act of having sex with a girl for the sole reason of adding to your career total or to break a slump in your current sexual activity.

Paul: Did you pull any ladies last night from the club?

Simms: Yeah took one home. Not much of a looker. Needed an empty net goal to get my confidence back.

Or..
Simms: Yeah I potted an empty net goal. My season totals were looking sad this year and I need to pad the stats.

by Paastastic7 June 13, 2013


Florida Field Goal

Having someone chug a beer, the half way through, they are kicked in the nuts with a steel toed boot, then they must finish the beer chug.

Dude did you hear what Walstrom did last night? He did 10 freaking Florida Field Goals....IN A ROW!

by T Dubb May 30, 2007

8๐Ÿ‘ 3๐Ÿ‘Ž


Best friend goals

The saying white girls use whenever they are(or they see)doing something cool together

*sees two girls wearing matching outfits* Becky: omg girl that is tots best friend goals i wish we could be like that but your such a stupid bitch.

by thatwhitehoe April 27, 2018

6๐Ÿ‘ 2๐Ÿ‘Ž


wife goals

wives: two girls (best friends) who are very close and are 'married' to each other, for example 'your my wife ily sweetie'

goals: something that someone aspires to be, a dream or wish, for example 'your outfit is goals!'

wife goals: a perfect couple (of two girls) who are both beautiful, smart, charming and funny.

'you two made valentines for each other? aw that's wife goals!'
''makaylah & natalie are such wife goals, they're so cute together!'

by lillian goode October 15, 2016

2๐Ÿ‘ 15๐Ÿ‘Ž