Jew Marmalade

When a man nearing their climax when engaging in sexual intercourse, then proceeds to ejaculate on the top rear section of the women's head resembling a yarmulke/kippah.

Chaim gave Liora a Jew Marmalade last night.

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Jew Bastard

Someone who is a very manipulative, stingy, penny-pinching, self-righteous snob. Snobby is optional, yet adds to the Jew factor. This term does not mean the person is an actual bastard of a Jewish parent. When the term "Jew" doesn't fit, adding "Bastard" is equivalent to underling the word "Jew".

Jew Bastard also represents an actual Jew that thinks their religion is superior to others, either speaking openly or doing so through actions.

Jew Bastard is the ultimate rape word for someone who is cheap, or will do anything to not throw a coin at anything. Cutting costs by cheating and lying. The term Jew and the act of being stingy is by no means an accident.

Alex stole utensils from Denny's to use in his home, and then continued to berate the waitress for no reason, and failed to leave a tip. In essence Alex is the biggest Jew Bastard to walk the earth on two feet.

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Jew Food

Goldfish brand chedder snack crackers, this is attributed to the overall "cheapness" of the product.

To keep the hungy children from rioting, we gave them jew food. This kept them happy and saved us money.

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jew in the cupboard

A jew that is in your cupboard, they usually are male but in some cases have been female. We don't know how they manage to get into the cupboards they are found in but all we know is that they are attracted by the smell of expensive tea/cup sets . If you find a jew in your cupboard you should follow these steps

1. Trap them in the cupboard , use something to block the doors E. G a muscle man/woman, broom etc

2. Alert everyone in the house of the jew in the cupboard and tell them to block the doors on all the remaining cupboards in the house. Jews have been known to chew through walls and make their way to other cupboards within the house.

3. Get anything of sentimental value out of the house E. G kids, money, cars, husband/wife, dog/cat/hampster/crocodile/komodo dragon...

4. Burn the house and everything inside that you left.

If this does not work follow theses steps

1. Run

2. Hide

3. Its coming

4.

Man: Honey where's my super-suit?
Woman: What?
Man: I said where's... My... Super-suit!
Woman: In the cupboard!
Man: Why is it in the cupboard?
Woman: Just get it!

Man: *opens cupboard * HONEY THERE'S A JEW IN THE CUPBOARD !!

the jew flu

a mutation of the corona virus that's sweeping across israel

hey murray i had a plane ticket to tel aviv next week but they cancelled my trip. the jew flu is out of control. oy vey!!

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Play the Jew

verb. to refuse to spend money, usually due to having spent money on bills or just needing to save money in general and thereby acting like a stingy Jew.

Guy1: Hey do you want to get a beer tonight?
Guy2: Sorry man, I gotta play the Jew tonight, I just paid car insurance...

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déjà Jew

when a person of Jewish heritage gets an oddly familiar feeling that his or her cleverness in financial matters is meeting with envy & resentment, or that, for reasons of religious differences, antisemitism is afoot

When that loser referred to the city as Jew York, he struck a déjà Jew cord with people of every race and religion.

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