speak pretzel

To tell a twisted tale that ought to be taken with a grain of salt.

Person A: Did you hear what she said?
Person B: Yeah, but she tends to speak pretzel so you can't believe it.

monkey speak

a way of explaining a subject simply through the use of metaphors including monkeys and bananas

bro can you explain inflation in monkey speak for me

Pollyanna Speak

News, economists, and personalities in the media and politics downplay growing disasters or negative outcomes when being direct is an inconvenient truth.

I read an article on the economy that use a lot of pollyanna speak when it comes to how bad the recession is going to get.

Dweeb Speak

Dweeb Speak is described as the mannerisms in the speech patterns of those who do not conform to society in modern day culture, that is considered quirky or uncool.
One who uses dweeb speak is worthy of respect, for they are nonconformist, as well as the fact that they are not ashamed of any quirks they themselves may possess, and are generally accepting of the quirks of other people.

Dweeb: Why hello there friend, like zonks dude, looks like some two slash one is getting his hunko donk mode on!
Local Chad: Yeah dude, I've been working out lately.
Dweeb: Well, my mom told me to zippity zoopity home over yonder, hunk on dude!
Bystander: Ugh, such Dweeb Speak does disgust me to my very core. We must away Archibald.

cyber speak

terms or jargon commonly used in communications through or referring to technology.

"She only communicates in cyber speak. Her last remark to me was 'Your treeware is almost as impressive as your yahoo email address. lol.'

Internetually speaking

Used to refer to something to do with the internet.

Or when making reference to something on the internet.

"Internetually speaking, I was as happy as a cat with a cheeseburger."

Internetually speaking, YouTube has become the go-to place for user-made content.

Speaking in Liddles

A term used when someone is trying to bemuse his/her collective audience by using complex words in a conversation that he/she has no understanding of.

Person 1: "evidently the opportune moment presented itself to one self and so consequently, ergo, vis a vis one had to take it....photosynthesis"

Person 2: "You're speaking in Liddles, mate"