a man sticks two fingers in his ass and shoves them up his girl's nose to harass her
Ed gave her a stool hand luke.
8๐ 1๐
the act of masturbating while using the computer.
i.e. your right hand is occupied, so you must navigate with your left.
bob: "hey man, are we going drinking tonight?"
bill: "naw man, i have a left hand mousing date with CSL0938 from adultfriendfinder."
9๐ 1๐
n. A male patient who is turned into a hand puppet during a hernia exam when his doctor crams his or her hand all the way up inside, totally inverting the scrotum.
Why are you limping?
I went to my doctor on account of mild abdominal pain and he turned me into a hernia hand puppet.
8๐ 1๐
Basically "Don't touch my stuff, punk."
Person A: Dude, awesome iPod!! (reaches for iPod)
Person B: Hey buddy, hands off the merchandise!
42๐ 13๐
Originally from northern Ontario, legend has it that the Hand Job Ghost has been known to sneak into rooms at night and give sleeping cottagers hand jobs. Also commonly used as a good excuse for waking up with with a surprise load of jizz in your pants.
1. Upon waking up with a creamy surprise in his bed, Cicero assumed that the Hand Job Ghost had paid him a visit in the night.
25๐ 8๐
A truly God Awful film. One of the worst films ever made. Made by fertilizer salesman Hal Warren on a bet that he could make a sucessful horror film.
Using $19,000, an old spring wound camera, made an unwatchable film. A film where Warren showed how amature his film was when he forgot to put the opening credits in.
A film where a man played by Warren, his wife, and his daughter stop at the inn of "The Master." The family meets Torgo and settle in for a night of horror. A featured part of the film is Warren's personal fantasy where women in translucent robes wrestle in the night. Disturbing in that the little girl becomes a wife of "The Master."
Proof that fertilizer sales people should never be allowed to make their own films.
35๐ 12๐
Luxurious form of male masturbation.
Step 1: Take off/drop pants or unzip.
Step 2: While standing, raise your leg onto a bench, chair or small stool.
Step 3: Reach under the raised leg. Taking a firm grip of The Penis.
Step 4: Maintain ringlike grip on The Penis with thumb and forfinger. Fanning out remaining three fingers.
Step 5: Rub it out. Maintain Fan.
Example 1
Matos: What's up Stef, your looking blue?
Stef: Man, cranking just isn't hitting the spot anymore.
Matos: Dude, just start pumping Back-Hand Fantails, it's like your knob won the lottery.
Example 2
Hayden: Yo, what you up to tonight Big Mattress?
Matt: Just popping off Back-Hand Fantails.
Hayden: Living large!
35๐ 12๐