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The equation used by a drunk person trying to figure the effects of the next few drinks
Using alcohol mathematics is a simple formula;
"I've had eight beers now and I feel really good ..... so if I have have another eight beers I'll feel TWICE as good!"
It gets worse when combined with a work day, figure this;
(I've used USA names in keeping with the American flavour)
Dirk; Hey, it's 2am .... don't you have a presentation to the board at 9
T-Bone; Yeah, but I figure I'm going to drink till 6, have a shower and breakfast, then write the presentation between 6:15 and 7:30, and that gives me an hour and a half to get to work by the public transport system (note the responsibility shown) and finish rehearsing on the train
Dirk; Boy, T-Bone, that multi-million dollar contract is in the bag .... another double bourbon?
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sumthin they use in candy instead of sugar,usually for people who care more about losing weight instead of dealing with an exploding ass for a couple of days. known to have a laxative effect causing exploding diarrhea(brown water),diarrhea farts, and cramping along with total humiliation if u are in public after the consumption.
if you by any candies with sugar alcohols, u might want to stay within 20 feet of a bathroom and do not plan any hot dates.
"when i bought sugar free peanut butter cups,i ate the whole bag. about an hour later i had to run to the bathroom grabbing my butt cheeks so the butt water wouldnt get on the carpet. i let out the most explosive diarrhea ever. this experience usually occurs within an hour or two after the consumption of them. this can happen about 10 times a day."
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the art of getting hammered and making bad decisions. The term alcohloic art was created by Mike.
Dude, we should have a party and practice alcoholic art!
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When a man is so drunk he can have sex with a girl for a long time because he is so drunk and his dick is full of liquid.
Hey sexy guy, wanna fuck me?
No, You can't handle my alcohol dick.
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A cult that people use to get sober. Though stating it is not a religion every meeting has readings, an offering basket, and talks a lot about God. For a lot of people AA becomes the new addiction. The majority of people are full of shit and show up drunk to the meetings and claim they have been sober for 20 years even though they smell like a bottle of cheap vodka.
Instead of just not drinking a lot of suckers think only God can do it for them via Alcoholics Anonymous when in reality all you have to do is not pick up the fucking bottle. The founder Bill W was a massive drug user, sex addict, and was probably drunk more than half the time at AA meetings.
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Giving a large shot of a hard alcoholic beverage to someone by way of their butt hole while they are supported upside down. This is favourable because alcohol entering the anus is absorbed into the bloodstream faster then if consumed orally. Try it with friends!
Q: Man, there's only one shot left. How am I supposed to get drunk tonight?
A: Take an alcoholic enima. Let me help you. It works every time.
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The act of scrolling through your contacts to find a person old enough and willing to buy you alcohol.
No need for the alcohol scroll man, I've already got us a 30 rack!
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