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Jokes made about the overrated, has-been actor Chuck Norris.
Examples of Chuck Norris Jokes:
Chuck Norris fought Mr. T, Rambo, Tupac, Bruce Lee, and the pink and yellow Power Rangers and lost, then vowed never to return to the nursing home on Halloween again.
Chuck Norris once attempted round house kicking Jet Li. His leg broke when it connected with the television, then he fell and broke his hip.
Chuck Norris almost turned down the offer to make a cameo in the movie "Dodgeball" on the grounds that he doesn't like to dodge balls—he prefers to have them resting on his chin.
When Chuck Norris completes a push-up, he does not actually move all the way down, it's the Earth moving up and punching him in the face.
Chuck Norris has been confused with Santa Clause, because whenever he enters a little boy's room he leaves with an empty sack.
Chuck Norris' penis is so small that when he has an orgasm the sperm are released in a single file line.
Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. During his stay he was arrested while attempting to have sexual intercourse with an island.
Chuck Norris beats off to "Pretty in Pink" three times a day with a wax figure of Andrew McCarthy lodged in his ass.
Chuck Norris was fired and arrested from his job at a Dallas Texas school after a video showed him smelling the football players’ jock straps. He was taken into custody oddly enough by a real Texas Ranger named Walker
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Chuck Norris has never seen a punch coming. He has only seen men adjust their shoulder slightly before he roundhouse kicks them in their face.
Surprising Chuck Norris has never been in a fight, only slaughters.
Chuck Norris choose the last pope
Sharks don't bite people when Chuck Norris goes for a swim.
A Bear can smell a drop of blood 2 miles away. Chuck Norris can smell fear 5.
Norris made history in 1997 when he was the first Westerner in the documented history of Tae Kwon Do to be given the rank of 8th Degree Black Belt Grand Master. In 2017 he will make history again when kicks everybodys ass... AT THE SAME TIME.
Chuck Norris doesn't carry atm cards, he only goes to registers and says CREDIT.
When Chuck Norris was born he gave the doctor a smack on the ass. The doctor still cry's till this day.
When Chuck Norris was a child he never asked WHY?
Chuck Norris didn't live through the cold war. He only put on and extra leather vest.
Chuck Norris is the only person that sees Shaq as a cute puppy.
Chuck Norris Facts are known to be true if this world were a utopia.
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n. The man with the hairiest balls on earth.
Chuck Norris is so cool he dusts ice cubes off his shoulders.
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Chuck Norris is cooooooooooooooly cooooooooool!
If you fed Chuck Norris 1Kg of organic matter he'd shit out enough fossil fuel to power the sun for the rest of time!
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A sexual position in which a guy fucks a girl so hard in the ass it she throws up as if she had gotten a roundhouse kick to the stomach, then proceeds to eat it.
I hear Sally got an Up Chuck Norris from Steve last night, guess she likes it rough huh?
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The act of sharing Chuck Norris jokes with friends, family, etc...
Herb: According to Einstein's Theory of Relativity, Chuck Norris can actually kick you YESTERDAY.
Samuel: Chuck Norris can speak Braille
Julie: OK group, stop Chuck Norris-ing, we need to get back to work on our project.
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Godly, Unstoppable, Amazing, Incredible, Extreme, Strong, Insanely Awesome, The Most Ultimate Ninja/Fighter In The World! Just About Every Word In The Entire Dictionary Is Describing Chuck Norris.
"Like lawl did you hear those Chuck Norris jokes?"
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