Random
Source Code
Random
one whos expertise is handling the male genitalia
he told me i was a handball expert last night.
8👍 1👎
Swagger that you get because either you are with someone that's got swag, or from borrowing someone's clothing or accessories that gets your swag on.
1. Sally: Whoa, Alex, I never thought you were very cool, but after seeing you and Soulja Boy together, I have to admit, you've got swagger!
Alex: Thanks, but its mostly second hand swagger.
2. Alex: Hey Soulja Boy, could i borrow some bling bling? I need to impress some ladies at the mall tonight with my swagger.
Soulja Boy: Sure man! Get your second hand swagger on!
7👍 1👎
Porn that has been previously used by someone you know, which is then given or referred to you.
Neil: "Yo man, I jerked a big one to this girl that was Mexican or some kind of Spanish! You gotta peeps it!"
Dave/Pete/Alex: "Nah man I don't tug it to second hand porn!"
7👍 1👎
Warning someone that they're gonna fight you
Bro don't piss me off, you tryna catch these hands
7👍 1👎
when a man has disproportionately small and weak looking hands. anyone encountering a human with gay little hands is encouraged to abuse them to the fullest. not to be confused with birth defects such as baby arms or baby hands, both of which are entirely acceptable unlike gay little hands.
man 1: wow, have you noticed Gayvid's gay little hands?
man 2: unfortunately yes i have. how does he hold a pen with those gay little hands?
man 1: i don't know but they sure are disgusting, fuck him.
37👍 15👎
A punchline to a popular joke involving a man and his wife who asks him a purely hypothetical question, "If I died, would you remarry". The punchline, for those of you who don't get it, is explained at the very bottom of the example.
A young married couple are taking a nice stroll down a long and rather winding road. There was a long way till they got home and there was plenty of time to have a long drawn-out conversation, so the wife decided to ask her husband a question she had on her mind for a long time:
Wife: "If I died, would you remarry."
Husband: "No, I love you too much to get married to a different woman."
Wife: "But you love being married, don't you? So honestly. You'd get remarried wouldn't you?"
Husband: *sigh* "Yeah, I guess I would get remarried eventually"
Wife: "Would you and your new wife live in our house?"
Husband: "Yeah, where else would we live"
Wife: "Would you take down all the pictures of me and you together?"
Husband: "Yeah, it would be very discourteous to her not to. I'd still keep the ones of me and you in my private drawer"
Wife: "Would you two sleep in our bedroom?"
Husband: "Yeah, where else would we sleep?"
Wife: "Would she use my golf clubs?"
Husband: "No, she wouldn't be able to. She's left-handed!"
Wife: ...
Husband: "SHIT!"
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
explanation
Him saying that she's left-handed implies he already has someone to get remarried with, meaning he's been cheating on his wife.
45👍 18👎
Derived from the famous drinking game Edward 40 Hands, this classier spectacle takes place during New Years Eve where inexpensive bottles of the notorious Andre California Champagne are ripe for the picking and replace the standard malt liquor 40 oz.
Strap them to your paws and await the applause.
Broski #1: Yo chief, what're you doing for New Years?
Broski #2: Edward Andre Hands, man. I got 6 bottles for less than ten cents.
47👍 19👎