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Spectacles that have no optically corrective effect. They are worn purely for fashion reasons by halfwits who think they make them look cooler or more intelligent.
"Check out that chick over there... she looks dead clever"
"No no.. they're fart goggles she has on, that bint is as thick as a platter of shit sandwiches"
5👍 2👎
A fart which, when trapped by a tightly tucked shirt, travels upward into the farter's shirt and escapes via shirt sleeves or neckhole.
"That was an unintentional crop dust, man. I had a vertical fart trapped in my shirt, and when I was talking to that hot chick, it leaked out of my arm holes! How embarrassing!"
5👍 2👎
When you PUSH and PUSH because you just KNOW that you're going to break the Guiness Book's record - and a pathetic little knuckle-pop of a fart barely squeezes out of your asshole
After eating that taco, I figured the fart that I felt was gonna scare the cat - instead - I micro-farted..
5👍 2👎
The heat felt from ones farts. It can be felt through direct contact with the fart, or afterward through contact with seat cushions that were just in contact with the fart.
*guy puts hand on seat cushion*
-"why is this seat cushion warm!? Is this body heat or fart heat?"
11👍 7👎
A fart which is released from someone's bare, unclothed ass. As opposed to a filtered fart which passes through underwear and/or outer clothing, a raw fart is smellier and will expell fecal matter and bacteria onto any nearby surface.
Person 1: Hey, why is Todd so sick?
Person 2: I released a raw fart into his silverware drawer.
Person 1: Wow, that will be the gift that keeps on giving until he's done using all those forks, spoons, and knives!
11👍 7👎
talking random jibberish to get rid of an awkward silence of a conversation that just dies before it even gets started
Scene: a dinner party and two women bring their hugely boring friend out for dinner to cheer her up but the partys over before it starts so someone has to fart talk to revive it
so how are you?
Fine...
Any news?
No....(awkward silence)
So, have you heard recently that after a chicken loose his head that he can live for forty days? did you know my neighbour has 5 rabbits???
....silence....
11👍 7👎
Being so overcome with feeling that some flatulence actually sneak out, usually from laughing really hard, or experiencing another extreme emotion.
Usually, in more serious cases, people tend to look the other way, like in nursing homes or car accidents, but yet the normal human will sneak that one giggle out before wiping the smile off of their face.
Man1: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Men 2,3, and 4: Idk why?
Man1: To get to the other side!
All Men together: *laughing hysterically*Man3 farts noticeably while loling.
All Men: Laugh harder from the seeping flatulence.
Man 2: *farts*
Man 1: *while laughing* you guys have a bad case of the Anxiety Farts don't you?
Man 3: Yeah, its just some Laughing Gas.
11👍 7👎