wet towels

A phrase originating in the online Steam community, most notably Team Fortress 2. It is noted for being a random exclamation, but is also the only word in the English language which is simultaniously an adjective, an adverb, an interjection, a noun, a verb, a conjunction, an article, a pronoun, a cardinal number, and two words.

Grimson: lol, that gun is Wet Towels! (Adjective)
Jiggs: I know, I wrap it in Wet Towels (Noun)
Grimson: I bet it shoots Wet Towelsly (Adverb)
Mikha: Wet Towels! (Interjection)
Jiggs: I have Wet Towels knife too! (Article)
Nuckpang: Lol, let's Wet Towels them! (Verb)
Grimson: Mmmmm, Wet'owels (Contraction)
Mikha: Wet Towels agrees with your sentiment (Pronoun)
Jiggs: To be Wet Towels not to be! (Conjuction)
Mikha: But how many Wet Towels? (Two Words)
Jiggs: Wet Towels (A Cardinal Number)

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Vowel And a Towel

To pleasure oneself while watching Carol Vorderman on countdown. Vowel regarding the nature of Countdown (word program) and towel is what you use to clean up after yourself.

Great, its 3pm - its almost time for my daily vowel and a towel!

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shit towel

A towel used for drying things other than the body. Typically the things soaked up are disgusting (ie: beer, bong water, ass-sweat, puke, etc.) A towel is no longer considered a shit towel once it has been cleansed of filth.

"Don't put that shit towel on me! I saw it lying on your floor for the last two months. It used to be white!"

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wet towelling

Wrapping your penis (or penises) in a wet towel and having intercourse with it.

Ah bro have you ever tried wet towelling in the shower before?

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batch towell

the material used to clean jism up after the act masterbation is complete

Joe hasnt washed his batch towell in weeks

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bum towel

A bum towel is a personal towel used specifically to dry ones butt cheeks (buttocks) and butt crack (inter gluteal cleft) after a bath, shower or swim.

The aim is to prevent wiping your arse over the rest of your body.

Did you just use my bum towel to wash your face? You just got my fecal matter all up in your grill.

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Waterproof Towel

Used to state how useless something is.

Very cleverly used in sarcastic sentences.

Joey: Dude, I got more soap!
Ben: It looks pretty filthy...
Joey: So...?
Ben: So its about as useful as a waterproof towel

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