is there an officer problem?

to be so shwayested when pulled over by the po po and mistakenly jumble up your words

excuse me, is there an officer problem?

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Naval Officer

The finest officers of the United States military. They are the most motivated, the most intelligent and the finest leaders of any of the nation's officer corps.

I am a Naval Officer. I command a 98,000 ton warfighting vessel, orchestrate air strikes, launch commando raids, plan invasions and gather intelligence in ways that other branches dream about.

So, whatcha do in the army or the marines? Stack boxes?

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Corner Office

Using the Handicap stall in a bathroom, because they are more spacious

Refers to the Corporate "Corner Office" Larger offices usually reserved for executives.

Sarah: "I have to go to the Bathroom, I will use the corner office, the regular stalls are so claustrophobic"

Ron: "Well there's no Handicaps around, I will corner office it"

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Office Hag

A woman in your office setting, typically in a admin/finance roll, who is under the assumption that she is the shit, despite glaring evidence to the contrary. Office Hags are typically identified by their outdated, brightly colored clothing, tennis shoes with panty hose and loud, shrill voice. Their habits include spreading gossip, making unfunny jokes and participating any any type of theme day the office might present to their employees (favorite sports team day, Hawaiian shirt day, etc.)

Hey Steve, check out that office hag's bright purple suit/mini skirt combo. At least the tennis shoes match the tights she's wearing this time. I'd like to step on her children's genitals.

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Office Lichens

Parasitic employees with no skills of their own who are great at delegating tasks to others

Lichens often face a dilemma when they overdelegate and in effect leave themselves with nothing to do.

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Office Pigeon

A coworker or superior who flutters into an otherwise efficiently operating business, causes major interruption and commotion, shits on everything and then goes away leaving everyone with a big time consuming mess to clean up.

Someone distract the boss. We are still stamping out fires from the last time that f*cking office pigeon graced us with a visit.

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Office Milf

A hot mother who is too conservative to be a regular milf, but at the office, classy enough, and definitely fuckable.

Karen (mother): Today when i was at work, my secretary looked up at me, and got a boner..
Lauren (daughter): Well mom, if it were anywhere else that wouldn't happen, but you're poppin' in the office.
Karen: What would that make me?
Lauren: An office milf, mom.

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