Before you start...

A term that you say when you did something that will piss someone off.
Said to the person who it will piss off to stop them from talking so you can explain.

Me- (I just crashed my car) shit, now what am I supposed to do.
Owner of car- What the Hell?
Me- Before you start...
Owner of car- the Hell did you do to my car?
Me- let me explain Damnit

i before e

If the word rhymes with bee put i before e

You should use i before e if the word rhymes with bee as in "I believe that he grieves" but not in "you weigh the sleigh"

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tacos before vatos

Hispanic slang for "food before guys".

"Tacos before vatos, ese."

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Bros before Hoes

A line used by sore losers who can't bear the thought of being left on their own in a party if their mates have tapped off - The fear of being without mates for a few hours and the thought of them not getting any action is too much to bear.

Phrase is used as a dirty underhand tactic as if to say "...dude, if you were my mate, you wouldn't go with her"

The rules of a flight squadron and wingmen dictate sometimes, one of you won't pull, and you accept that if the team feasts, you feast in their glory.

A true bro doesn't get jealous and fuck his mates' chances up cos he can't get some.

A true "bro" is happy for his mate when he gets tail and actually encourages it.

All for one and one for all, not NONE FOR ALL...

See also: Emotional Blackmail, Cock Block, Cock Blocking, Wingman

Scenario One:

End of a houseparty, not many girls left. Nico doesn't really fancy said girl, he just wants to pull, but girl wants to pull dude and vice versa.

Nico: "I got dibs on that girl first, I saw her first"

Dude: "She's not into you dude, and we're kind of got a thing going on"

Nico: "Dude, don't get with her man, you're not a friend if you do... Bros before hoes..."

Dude "(What a tit)"

Scenario Two:

Dude: "Why are you following me and my lady home? Isn't your dad picking you up?"

Nico: "I fancy her man, she's Greek, and so am I"

Dude: "Well go fuck your sister then, this girl's been with me all night"

Nico "She liked me first. And I saw her first"

Dude: "...what the fuck...."

Nico: "Ok, lets share her then..."

Dude: "Lad, I wouldn't share a snickers or share my pint with you - what the fuck makes you think I wanna share a girl?"

Nico, pathetically: "Bros before hoes..."

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Chicks before dicks

When you and you close friends form a sisterhood and agree not to fuck each others ex husbands

Oh Maria I really hope you didn't sleep with Jimbo , remember chicks before dicks

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fashion before function

When something is more about the appearence than the functionality or working.

Literal meaning: "I don't understand girls with high heels, it's fashion before function." (high heels are extremely uncomfortable, but fashionable)
Joke-like/metaphorical meaning:

-Look at that poser, can he even ollie?
-I don't think so, fashion before function. (Posers only look good, they can't do shit)
P.s. I'm not a native-speaker, so the examples might be a bit lame, but I'm pretty sure the definition is right.

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monkeys before the monolith

Being confronted by a computer (or technical) problem that you lack the skills (or intelligence) to resolve. A reference to the movie "2001," where confused monkeys are confronted by superior alien technology in the form of a monolith and beat it with sticks.

Dude A: My dad couldn't program his DVD player, and got totally pissed.

Dude B: Yep, monkeys before the monolith.

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