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The Beer Gorilla is, despite its size and strength, a remarkably stealthy creature. Beer Gorillas only come out very late at night or in the early hours of the morning. They stalk their prey - invariably, intoxicaed males - with great cunning, folloing them to their place of dwelling.
The Beer Gorilla then waits patiently until all the occupants of the preisesare asleep and/or uncosncious before commencing its rampage. Sometimes the Gorilla will have sneaked in to the house after the drunken humans, and concelaed itself; on other occasions, it will employ its remarkable cimbing skills to enter via an upstairs window, or in extreme cases, a chimney - like a sort of Sith Santa Claus.
Once inside the premises, the Gorilla proceeds to trash te place. Typical activities incude:
- Eating every item of food in the premises and leaving the open containers scattered around (sometimes the Gorillla will order in a takeaway if insufficent cmestibles re to hand.
- Leaving a kettle, or a suacepan containing eggs, on the stove to boil dry
- Vomiting in a wide range of locations
- Mis-connecting hi-fi equipment in an attempt to access encrypted satellite channels without the proper equipment
- leavng refirdgerator and freezer doorsope just enough to ensure the contents spoil
- Depositing turds of gargantuan proportions in lavatoies, then failing to flush. Often, muc work with a spade, chisel and bilhook is needed the following day to disrupt the structure of thse megaturds to the point where they will pass the U-bend, st hey have a tendency to set like cement.
- urinating in beverage containers
- Using an electric razor on domestic pets in a way that amuses intoxicated h8umns, but not the pets involved.
- Arranging items of street furniture (moveable or fixed) in various artistic patterns trougout the property
- Placing a complete stranger, in an unconscious and partially or completely unclothed state, on a couch, floor or sofa. Often the Gorilla will swap such individuals from other locations
they visit, ensuring that when they awake, niether they nor the normal occupants have any idea of how they came to b there, or where their clothing and posessions are.
The Gorilla will also damge houehold fiztures andfittings in peculiar and inexplicable ways, and introduce substances such as floor polish, multisurface cleaner, and talcum powder into the mouths of sleeping residents, then disposing of any fruit juice or other beverages which might be used to disperse the resultant dry mout and awful taste.
They will also conceal or destroy all stocks of tea, coffee, and medications suitable for relieving hangovers.
In the process of performing the above tasks, the Gorilla will also overturn furniture, strew clothes around, and cause utter chaos, like a quiet but extremely thorough Poltergeist.
"Who are you, and wha are you doing on my sofa ?"
"Search me .... the Beer Gorilla must have broght me. Say, where's my clothes ?
"Oh my GOD !"
"SHIT ! That bloody Beer Gorilla's followed us home AGAIN !"
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An extremely well developed muscle-clad forearm developed from many decades of having a chronic masturbation habit
Rupet's gorilla forearm shrank considerably in the years following meeting Mary
The Upset Gorilla is a sexual act in which the male participant inserts his penis into the pussy, while beating on his chest and screaming like a gorilla. The second part of the act is where after the male ejaculates, he screams even louder and throws the female participant across the room provided there is enough space.
Randy: Bro last night I tried The Upset Gorilla with Annabelle! Shit was sooo intense.
Marcus: Your a freak dude...
Peeing in the Spider-Man position over your bathtub when you have a raging boner
That was the hardest Milwaukee Gorilla ever. I had a raging boner too.
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The best game to ever be on App Store.
With all the features in the game, Flying Gorilla has been considered Best Game of 2022 by it's players. Having better graphics than Among Us, Flying Gorilla has earned possibly 10 million dollars because of it's graphics and great gameplay.
The controls are super complex but easy to dominate, you swipe your finger. After swiping your finger INSERT FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDY'S: SECURITY BREACH OBJECTIVE HERE.
People also often ask for Nintendo, Sony and Valve to add the game to their game library.
YOOO I JUST DOWNLOADED FLYING GORILLA!
OMG LET'S PLAY!!
Man this trash game Flying Gorilla sucks.
Hands up!
sucking on the dick so hard, it creates a vacuum in spacetime
yoooooo they gorilla sucked so hard I astral projected for 5 days damn