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The true reason for people to hit the gym and start repping. Every rep you make is a rep for Jesus. Because of the cross that is attached to his body he isn't able to rep anymore. This has caust a significant loss of gains. Every rep will make Jesus a proud boy, after al he was the establisher of fitness. Very old people remember him as the boy who carried a bigass piece of wood to the top of a hill. Later that day Jesus though: "what have i done" but that's an other story.
Because God is a shame of his weak son. He made people think repping is a bad thing, it will make Jesus look bigger if everyone else is a skinnymotherf*cker. So before you start repping, you have to ask for forgiveness for the gains you are about to receive.
Please come in. Welcom in my church, i can see you have done a lot of reps for Jesus.
My favourite fictional character.
My favourite characters include, Harry Potter, The Easter Bunny, Santa, and Jesus.
The Jewish religious teacher whose life, death, and resurrection. (thats it)
jessica: I love jesus!
jake: I know right!
2👍 17👎
person 1: hey do you know jesus?
person 2: yea i saw him play A Night Out On Earth last night
Jesus is the kind of guy that would buy a Krispy Kreme, and dip it in ranch dressing just because.
Jesus will be like, "Ayo, gimme sum of that ranch dressing. Imma dip this finger-licking dope ass Krispy Kreme in it, likah boneless wing"
Yeah they aren't going to be in any order. It'll just be as I think of them. I actually thought of these a while ago but whatever...
Guard "Um, ah shit this is gonna suck- Harod? Um... King Harod?"
Harod "What!?"
Guard "Um... Shit... There's a guy running around saying he's the creature dawg."
Harod "Pft! What!?" *snickers*
Guard "Uh... Yeah... It's pretty bad man."
Harod "Wait, what?" 🤨
Guard "Yeah, no he is walkin on water and shit... Making fish-"
Harod "MAKING FISH! OH! OOOOOOH SHIT"
Guard "Yeah........"
Harod "OOOOOH SHIT! OH! I'M HYPERVENTILATING! OOOOOH! THIS!"
Guard "Yeah..."
Harod "WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO!?"
Guard "I donno man..."
Harod "OOOOH SHIT.... He is going to fuck our shit UP MY GUY!"
Guard "Damn..."
Harod "Yeah! This is not a good thing. What's happening right now? We are fucked! Oh man- Where is it!? What is it even doing!? What do I even call it!?"
Guard "He's- Yeah... He's like a guy man. He's Jesus. He's got a name and everything. He's like a guy now... In the world. Just HERE."
Harod 😨
Guard "Yahp..."
Harod "Get it. Get rid of it. Wait! Bring it here... Bring it here I need to see it."
Guard "How... Am I supposed to..."
Harod "Bwah, shit I don't know... Get a bunch of guys. Grab him. Put him in a sack."
Guard *sigh*
Harod "Yeahyeah I know it's... Look. We gotta get it man. Holy shit this is really bad..."
Guard "Yeah... Alright..."