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Jesus Eyes

A person in the 7th grade that likes to stare at burritos like they are jusus

Me: Oh my gosh Ellie Carter is totally Jesuseyeing that burrito

Ellie: Totally!!
Me: We should nickname him jesus eyes!

by Jesuseye's best friend February 4, 2017


ah jesus christ

a think i cant stop saying

ah jesus christ

by person who writes definoitonss December 13, 2020

1👍 6👎


Jesus Lighting

Jesus Lighting is the result of a camera focusing on you with light in the background resulting in the person in the photograph being surrounded by heavenly white

Person 1: “How was the visit at the park with your friend?”

Person 2: “Good; very sunny, I took a picture of my friend facing the sun and when I looked at the photo, I got him in Jesus Lighting”

Person 1: “lmao”

*may or may not be based on a true story*

by roach.baddie September 15, 2023


Jesus's Army

Jesus's Army are a peaceful Christian organisation who usually drive around to their religious gatherings in rainbow or multi coloured vehicles usually dilapidated vans or mini buses. Jesus's Army love to spread the word of our Lord and Saviour through rustic songs acapella style or often led by tambourine's, maracas,spoons and entry level guitar playing.
Unfortunately due to Jesus's Army only feeling love and seeing good in their fellow man they can often fall foul of being abused by drunken thugs who will initially express a real interest in turning their sad lives around with Jesus's help only to blag free rides to their next watering hole and further cementing their own place in Hell.

Dave we've drank and gambled all our money on fruit machines. We literally only have enough for 4 more pints each with no cash machine visits available and we still need to get home with no money for a taxi.
Fear not there is some rainbow coloured van there with a heavy smell of marijuana and Christian love exuding from it. That is definitely Jesus's Army and if we tell them we are interested in signing up and turning our lives around with the help of the Lord I think we can blag a lift.

by Another pseudonymal August 5, 2022


tastes like jesus

Used to describe when something was terrible. Can be used for awkward social interactions, bad-tasting food, an event that was a total let down, or when you have to give great customer service to a total asshole.

*you escape from an awkward social interaction where everyone was struggling and failing miserably to make conversation*
"Man, that tasted like Jesus."

*person eats something rotten*
"Ew! " *spits out food* "Dont eat that, that shit tastes like Jesus!"

by Someplace Dude February 29, 2016


Jesus Piece

A man’s dick or penis

Girl drop those yams on this Jesus piece

by Jahnutz August 3, 2024


Jesus Piece

A man’s genitals, specifically the shaft

Girl throw throw those yams on my Jesus piece

by Jahnutz August 3, 2024