COVID GUILT

When you buy things for someone who you infected with COVID.

A Maryland resident was feeling ill and took an at-home COVID test on Christmas weekend. Since the results were negative, he spent time with his children and grandchildren. However, the following day, he tested positive for COVID. Not surprisingly, he infected all 3 families in attendance. Due to COVID guilt, the man is now taking the whole family on a long-awaited family trip to the beach this summer.

COVID-19

COVID-19 is this damn virus that makes people buy toilet paper and stay inside and wear masks and stay in online school
and suffer and be lonely and cough and die and is just all around a bad thing

dude 1: Man I hate COVID-19, we get stuck inside
dude 2: Me too bro it sucks

3👍 3👎

Covid Eye

Mike Pence's puffy bloodshot sickly eyeballs during VP debate

Bruce was watching the vice presidential debate with his roommate, Carl, and Kamala Harris walked out. "she's amazing!" Bruce exclaimed. when cameras panned to Mike Pence, Carl dropped his beer. "OMG WTF is wrong with Pence? his eyes are obviously diseased. after breathing air in White House's contagious-disease cluster looks like he's got Covid Eye!"

Covid-50

The weight you gained during covid lockdown. Sometimes it’s in pounds, but for some people it’s in kgs.

“He looks so different now thanks to covid-50

COVID Werewolf

The person who originally contracted and spread COVID to your cluster. Generally this person got the vid from an unknown source and spread the virus to his friends. The best way to identify your werewolf is through contact tracing. Named the werewolf due to the old legend that all werewolves descend from an original werewolf who infected the other werewolves.

Bob: I have COVID and I got it through Bill. Bill got it from Jimmy who got it at a Lame Impala concert. I guess Jimmy is my COVID werewolf.

Covid Arm

When over masterbating Due to the coronavirus causes a guy to have one buff, muscled up arm

Man look at his COVID ARM, he must’ve been jacking for days!

COVID-crafty

Adjective describing a person who is forced to become crafty by COVID-19 sequestering: e.g., issuing copycat sidewalk chalk art projects to their kids, darning socks instead of braving Costco, baking.

I tried repeatedly to explain that I am the opposite of a crafty Pinterest mom. I have zero creativity. I am only COVID-crafty.