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Noun.
1. The fictional repository of all the spurious claims, fake evidence and out-and-out bullshit lies that a loudmouth douchebag at your office tries to pass of as fact.
2. Material of such doubtful veracity as to require the launch of a small religion in order to be believed by anyone.
A: "And when I was a little girl, gypsies came to town and kidnapped some of the neighborhood kids. Ever since then I can hear cats' feelings with my mind."
B: "Sure, mom, I'll be sure to save that one for the Bible II."
X: "And then these two uber-tasty half-Japanese, half-Brazilian auto-show models got in the Space Shuttle we borrowed from Dane Cook and they gave us guitars made out of weed that you could really play because the weed strings and weed pickups were treated with this molecular catalyst that turns THC into superconductive metal."
Y: ". . ."
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People that have been brain washed by a powerful force since childhood. They are so brain washed that many spend every minute of their lives studying the bible and their life is dictated and controled by some book and not by their own instincts or being, if it wasn't for their bible they'll be criminals and/or dead. They base every second of their life in religious affairs, and many talk about their religion (those christians)as if it were the ultimate righteousness.They love to make people that have no religious interest or affiliations feel angry because they like to push people into their religion as if it were the most "truthfull and accurate" religion there is.
"flanders, go suck a bible!"(quote by homer j. simpsom, end quote.)
Bible head, bible head
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A person (to hereto be referred to as X) who is angered such by the mere existence of people who don't believe they will exist in X's imaginary place when they cease to exist for not believing in X's imaginary friend, that X will, on encountering non-X, desperately make sure to communicate X's belief that all non-X will come to exist in X's imaginary place when they cease to exist for not believing in X's imaginary friend while X will come to exist in X's 2nd imaginary place when X ceases to exist as a consequence of believing in X's imaginary friend. But this is only the beginning of the paradoxes, as despite being angered by the mere existence of non-X, believes that most non-X represents the vast majority of the human race and will therefore exist in the first imaginary place when they cease to exist while only they and their friends will exist in the second imaginary place when they and their friends don't exist. Also paradoxically, X firmly believes in the critical importance of 10 arbitrary rules of conduct, even though they make absolutely no difference according to X's own beliefs as to which imaginary place an individual is comes to exist in when that individual ceases to exist. More paradoxes include the condoning of the crusades despite these 10 rules of conduct, the belief that not only the first religion that theirs grew out of but the third one that appended onto their own are both inherently evil while theirs is good, the belief that the guidebook containing these 10 rules of conduct and much other paradoxical material contains no paradoxes or self-contradictions whatsoever despite the ease of finding references that clearly point out numerous such self-contradictions, that every scientific theory of the last 500 years, except POSSIBLY excluding the theory of gravity, IS completely self-inconsistent, and yet that science somehow exists for the purpose of glorifying X's imaginary friend, and often appeal to the superficial knowledge of the parts of this science that doesn't flagrantly contradict with their beliefs in their attempts to deride the rest of this science which they denounce entirely.
How to deal with Bible-Thumpers:
Method 1: Tell him you don't agree with him. Then follow it up with explaining why everything he believes in is all a crock of nonsense invented by a cult of bronze-age savages if you're harsh, debunk his claims, one by one if intermediate and if you're gentle, just try to persuade him that nothing he can say can convince you to believe what he does:
A few weeks ago a bible thumper came to my door and said that fish fossils were found at the tops of mountains and that it proves that there was a great flood. I told him that is the result of continental drift and that they are hundreds of millions of years old and not only don't prove there was a worldwide flood thousands of years ago but prove that the world is at least 100 thousand times as old as he says. He then said that they dated to only a few thousand years ago. I in turn told him that if he tries to use radioisotope dating to convince me that the universe is 6000 years old, that he has lost the argument before he even began it.
Pros: you'll feel superior
Cons: You're going to end up arguing for a really long time
Method 2: Nod your head and agree with him
Have you accepted Jesus as your savior?
Say "uh huh" and nod your head.
Pros: potentially get rid of him fast.
Cons: Somewhat humiliating. Can backfire especially if he then asks followup questions and tries to get you to join his bible study group.
Method 3: Put a door knocker on your door that looks like male genitalia.
Pros: Bible thumpers may decline to knock on your door in the first place.
Cons: Your neighbors and the mailman may suspect you of being a child molester. Except that neighbor up the hill who drives the Prius with rainbows painted all over it. He'll probably ask you on a date.
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the term for someone who shops at blue rinse, trying to pull off the "indie" genre but look like a total wanker, also has mank hair ( Y ).
"niice ..."
wow nice tattoo man
"retro bible"
printed across all fingers
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Origion: Bibles usually had a black leather or paper cover. Since books were expensive a leather cover offered long term use and durability. Printing on the cover was usually in gold lettering.
More Archaic Definition: Bible black originally meant to quote Holy Scripture in such a way as to legitimize cruelty or other evils. The intent is always destructive, with the prideful desire to maintain the appearance of piety and propriety.
Usually, the Scripture has to be taken out of context to meet its dark goal so it will be parsed as a lawyer would to make the true point.
Example 1: Yes, well of course I hate you, "And I will hate you with a perfect hatred".
Ignoring John, "Whoever hates his brother does not remain in the light". Or Jesus, "Whoever hates his brother in his heart commits murder". Or Moses, "You will not hate your brother in your heart".
Example 2: "I've had enough of you and your Bible Black"
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A term used to disguise the act of smoking pot.
"Hey Jimmy, wanna come over and read the bible?"
"Ok, sounds good, i'll bring my lighter"
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When Bible pages are used to Roll a Blunt. Generally a Gideons Bible works best.
Last night we went to a hotel and rolled some "sweet" bible blunts.
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