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Circular jerk

Similar to circular logic; When people stroke themselves by stroking others. Very common in the corporate setting.

Board member: Mr. Peterson is doing a stellar job running this company. I'm so glad I cast the deciding vote to hire him.

Employee under breath: Running this company into the ground. Classic circular jerk, dude.

by m&jsandwich August 20, 2011


cave jerk

when one masturbates with his/her arm under one leg whilst making caveman noises

*knock knock*
"What's all that strange grunting?"

"wtf?!? I'm cave jerking in here!"

by ohmschode January 13, 2009


emergency jerk

You had no privacy for several days and no chance to jerk off. Your balls are so sore that you cannot think straight. You jerk off the first chance you get just to relieve the tension.

I was on vacation and could not jerk off for more than a week. I was so sore that sleeping was impossible. I sneaked my way into the bathroom for an emergency jerk.

by Restoring for over five years February 17, 2015


Missionary Jerk

A sexual position performed by homosexuals in which while facing each other (similar to the missionary position performed by a heterosexual couple) the top partner places his penis in the anus of the bottom partner while at the same time the top partner will also masturbate the bottom partner.

Last night Jake missionary jerked Connor.

by Professor Pad April 30, 2011

25๐Ÿ‘ 6๐Ÿ‘Ž


Beef jerking

To sprinkle beef ramen flavored packet on your penis and have your partner jerk you off until the semen mixes thoroughly with the powder so it becomes a fine mixture. Then you and your partner swallow it.

I was too poor for condoms so me and my partner were beef jerking instead.

by analdestroyer69 February 5, 2014

24๐Ÿ‘ 5๐Ÿ‘Ž


suicidal jerk

When you beat your meat while everyone's home and forget to lock the door

Dude, I just had a suicidal jerk last weekend. It was sketchy

by The boonigan man September 17, 2017

39๐Ÿ‘ 11๐Ÿ‘Ž


Hummingbird Jerk

1. To masturbate furiously; process by which the human male masturbates so fast that both the hand and the penis become blurred. The Hummingbird Jerk is generally done for one of two reasons:
a. Time constraints; the masturbator has a place to go, such as work or church, but is a compulsive masturbator or has blue balls and has a physiological need for ejaculatory release.
b. Recent extreme physical attraction to the opposite sex (or the same sex, as in Nick's case); due to a mentally inspired rush of adrenaline and testosterone, as well as a throbbing erection, the masturbator gets lost in the process, taking self-gratifiction to the point where penis flesh becomes torn and damaged.

The Hummingbird Jerk is also known as the Hummingbird ("I was in such a hurry that I had to give myself a Hummingbird")

a. Knowing that he could not perform his duties at work with blue balls, Drew gave himself a Hummingbird Jerk so not to be late.
b. "Because I was thinking about Jen's face being covered with my semen, I unintentionally escalated to a Hummingbird Jerk."

by The Fabulous Jizzblaster April 24, 2005

36๐Ÿ‘ 10๐Ÿ‘Ž