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Random
A baby who breastfeeds.
My wife's friend just had twins; she now has two milk vampires to feed all day. Brutal!
14👍 3👎
For those who work in retail during the holiday season it's the phenomenon of going into work in the dark and going home in the dark-- thus eliminating any sun exposure for about 3 months.
co worker: "You gonna skip out early today boss?"
boss: "Nah, you know us retail vampires-- all day every day!"
44👍 15👎
The skin that is never meant to see the light of day.
What is up with those shorts?
What do you mean?
They are so short, they show your vampire skin.
12👍 2👎
{Vampire diaries} is the best show ever it’s how these people turn in to {vampires} and shows you how they live and what they do some are mean but some are nice and how two people fall in love
{me} You should vampire diaries it’s the best
{friend} I already did I watched them all
{me} no way
11👍 2👎
1.) A more intense form of the STD Crabs.
2.) The lice-like creatures that infest the pubic hair of an individual suffering from said STD.
Crabs are contagious; Crotch Vampires are voracious.
11👍 2👎
A movie that well... kind of sucked. Based on the previews, it really didn't look bad. Anything that has dancing werewolves and a spoof about some of those insane team Edward/Jacob fans can't be too bad, right? Wrong. This movie is only 80 minutes, but it feels much longer. The movie drags on, and the plot is just random. It has a few good moments that make you laugh, but for the most part, you just want it to end. It doesn't even matter if you love or hate Twilight. Both Twilight lovers and haters could have enjoyed this movie. Instead, lovers hate it because it doesn't even make sense, and haters hate it because it is a lame parody of Twilight. Overall, it is a complete waste of time and money. Enjoy.
Boy #1: "Vampires Suck? Isn't that the movie that makes fun of Twilight? I want to see it!"
Boy #2: "Yeah, well Vampires Suck sucks even more than Edward Cullen with a sippy cup of blood!"
55👍 20👎
A vampire who drinks tomato juice.
Vampire 1: Hey, wanna hit the whorehouse tonight and have a few drinks?
Vampire 2: No thanks; I'm vegan.
62👍 24👎