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Sorry, I don't sprechen the douche.

Response to someone either being a douche, saying something douchey, or telling you to get an รœber.

Play on "sprechen sie deutsch"

Q: "Why don't you just take an รœber?"

A: "Sorry, I don't sprechen the douche."

by Bob Rogue March 22, 2016

13๐Ÿ‘ 1๐Ÿ‘Ž


don juan de la douche

A person, who in their own mind, beleives they are the center of attention. These people display one pathetic attempt after another to impress the opposite sex (In some cases, the same sex). In reality this person is a complete idiot, and are oblivious to the fact that they are displaying all qualities of a "DoucheBag". These people also have no age limitations when trying to hook up.

Haha, look at Brandon Willis over there trying to mack, a true Don Juan De La Douche!

by Tsumaranai June 16, 2007

23๐Ÿ‘ 3๐Ÿ‘Ž


Butt-Hurt Douche Bag

Pink American Eagle Polo shirt + Wrist watch on right hand + Shitty cell phone = Butt-hurt douche bag

That guy Tyler Hill is a butt-hurt douche bag!

by wintiem September 21, 2010

3๐Ÿ‘ 8๐Ÿ‘Ž


Out of Body Douche Bag Experience

Saying something out of character and so completely rude that you cannot believe it came out of your mouth.

After telling his friend that they shouldn't talk anymore, he was shocked and explained what happened, "I'm so sorry. I had an out of body douche bag experience."

by MLS123456 May 5, 2011

8๐Ÿ‘ 2๐Ÿ‘Ž


Private Douche Messaging-(PDM)

The result of 2 Online Forum members in a posting arguement- sending pointless messages back and forth over which one thinks he has a bigger cock

Jtskier11- Your jumping to conlcusions again. Nowhere did I say anything was better! Your douchebaggery is staggering.

thx J11...best compliment i've gotten all day....

wow...a mechanical device that isnt perfect...what a revelation!?!?!?

Don't wry moderators.....switching to Private Douche Messaging-(PDM)!

by Bronic August 7, 2008

2๐Ÿ‘ 2๐Ÿ‘Ž


Gloating Douche bag Rock Climber

A person at your local rock climbing gym who brags and constantly brings up other people's failures and their own small accomplishments in order to make themselves feel better. Brags and makes others feel sorry for even participating in this amazing sport. Most of the time is a male.

The Gloating Douche bag Rock Climber does not brag by choice. He needs to brag in order to sexually arouse himself because he has no confidence in himself unless he his gloating.

Often extremely insecure and rarely gets laid.

Often uses terms like "fag, donkey balls, knob gobbler, scrotum sucker, gay, and homo" to belittle others while simultaneously hinting that they are confused about their own sexuality.

Gloating Douche Bag Rock Climber: Hey I think I'm the BEST in the climbing club out of everybody that just started. They all suck donkey balls except for me. I'm better than you too. Aren't I?? Aren't I??

Person: Yes you climb very well, the others are climbing well too.

Gloating Douche bag: What the fuck fag!? I'm like 10 times better than you, You can't climb half the shit I climb, you're so gay! I'm the Best you cock juggler!

Person: Rock climbing is about having fun and being the best you can be; not about comparing yourself to others to arouse yourself. you are a disgrace to the sport. Goodbye.

Gloating Douche bag: Fuck yeah I'm the best. Better masturbate in the gym's bathroom before this boner goes away!

by Zeus717 February 18, 2011

7๐Ÿ‘ 4๐Ÿ‘Ž


twinkle twinkle little douche

A guy who is so blinded by his own ego that he thinks he can lead on any girl he wants and act practically like bf and gf then get back with his gf out of the blue leaving the other girl confused and wondering what went wrong...Twinkle twinkle little douche differs from douche bag because a douche bag at least knows he's a douche but just doesn't give a fuck whereas a twinkle twinkle little douche thinks he is god's gift to girls yet still thinks he is a "good guy" but for some reason still can only commit to high school girls because college girls intimidate him because they won't take his shit and worship the ground he walks on, yet would be way better gfs than his current one...term popularized by the MTV show "Is she Really Going Out with Him?"

Girl 1:I though he really liked me...? :/

Girl 2:He DID really like you, he's just a twinkle twinkle little douche so he thinks he can lead girls on until the next one or until he decides to get back with his fake ass, photoshopped skanky gf...

Girl 1: He can go fuck himself

by regretbutdontforget March 28, 2010

2๐Ÿ‘ 5๐Ÿ‘Ž