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Amish Jesus

Amish Jesus is Jesus with a horse drawn carriage and a funny top hat.

Kanye W: Bro that mf look like Amish Jesus the way he got the beard and hat.

by Lil Hemmorrhoid September 17, 2022


Rave Jesus

you basically grab your nearest metal head that has a beard and long hair and throw them in a rave (specifically at a cosplay convention) Give them a little spike-glowstick crown like Jesus and give something to drink like alcohol and BOOM you got your self a rave Jesus

Guy 1: GUYS LOOK, ITS THE RAVE JESUS!!
everyone: YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Rave Jesus: *passed out on the floor*

by goth_jesus April 8, 2024


Mexican Jesus

A hot mexican guy with long hair who moast likely gets called that by his close friends (his real name is probably david or antonio)

Friend: Hello Mexican Jesus

David: rly lol

by mr.miguel dannyboy March 3, 2022


Jesus [Yeshua]

Letter from Pilate to Tiberius Caesar

A young man appeared in Galilee preaching with humble unction, a new law in the Name of the GOD that had sent Him. At first I was apprehensive that His design was to stir up the people against the Romans, but my fears were soon dispelled. Jesus of Nazareth spoke rather as a friend of the Romans than of the Jews. One day I observed in the midst of a group of people a young man who was leaning against a tree, calmly addressing the multitude. I was told it was Jesus. This I could easily have suspected so great was the difference between Him and those who were listening to Him. His GOLDEN COLORED HAIR and beard gave to his appearance a celestial aspect. He appeared to be about 30 years of age. Never have I seen a sweeter or more serene countenance. What a contrast between Him and His bearers with their black beards and tawny complexions! Unwilling to interrupt Him by my presence, I continued my walk but signified to my secretary to join the group and listen. Later, my secretary reported that never had he seen in the works of all the philosophers anything that compared to the teachings of Jesus. He told me that Jesus was neither seditious nor rebellious, so we extended to Him our protection. He was at liberty to act, to speak, to assemble and to address the people. This unlimited freedom provoked the Jews -- not the poor but the rich and powerful.

See Washing Library

Your most obedient servant,
Pontius Pilate

Jesus Yeshua was seated at the right hand of GOD his Father in the begining! As was The Holy Spirit and Wisdom. The FEAR of GOD is the first sign of Wisdom!

by THE-INTELLECTUAL July 14, 2024

2674๐Ÿ‘ 7๐Ÿ‘Ž


Holy shit, Jesus fucking Christ! What the fuck!?!

A response to someone who is/was doing an action that is morally wrong, such as murder.

Holy shit, Jesus fucking Christ! What the fuck!?! You just killed the man!

by Not a Dictionary March 9, 2021

1๐Ÿ‘ 356๐Ÿ‘Ž


God Jesus

Saying God Jesus backwards, sounds like Sausage Dog. suseJ doG.

God Jesus sure sounds like Sausage dog, when you say it backwards.

by liveforgiving May 18, 2021


marijuana jesus

marijuana jesus is a person who smokes the holy plant cannabis, walks on water, and is made up.

marijuana jesus: that was some nice bud judas
judas: im gonna go betray you and smoke all your weed

by marijuana jesus December 9, 2016