biscuit wanker

N. 1. Moronic individual who derives auto-erotic pleasure from stanky cheddar infused biscuits, but is too cheap-ass to actually buy them, and so bogarts them off of another...

N 2. A person of exceptionally low intelligence, who derives simple minded pleasure from contemplating a basket of stanky biscuits...

1. That freakin biscuit wanker was standing outside the window of the restaurant trying to get him some cheddar.

2. I tell my lil biscuit wanker that he's "special," not a dumbass-- that would hurt his self-esteem.

Fastrack Wanker

Someone who purchases and uses fastrack tickets to beat the queues at theme parks.

Have you only just come out of the ride? It's been ages!

I know. There were so many fastrack wankers going in before us.

The queue is really long. We should probably fastrack it.

But we don't want to be fastrack wankers!

wanker beanie

Simply put - a condom.

Jennifer wouldn't let Jack fuck her without wearing a wanker beanie.

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Wanker

A less harsh way of saying and or calling a person a Jerk off

Fuck you ya fuckin Wanker

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Cockney Wanker

Someone from London, usually second hand car salesmen, who read the sun newspaper, call all women " dawlin' " (trans: darling) and general ponce about the place like they are something special.

Cor Blimey Guvnah, I'm a cockney wanker, and no mistake!

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Bed wanker

One who masterbates in bed then rolls around repeatedly in one bodly fluid.

Dude you're a filthy bed wanker, full of crusty cum.

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Bus Wankers

People who are standing at a bus stop as they are to poor to have a car.

(Driving past people standing at a bus stop)

Jay : Oi Bus Wankers!

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